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I thought such awful thoughts that I cannot even say them out loud because they would make Jesus want to drink gin straight out of the cat dish.

Anne Lamott

I am going to notice the lights of the earth, the sun and the moon and the stars, the lights of our candles as we march, the lights with which spring teases us, the light that is already present.
ANNE LAMOTT

Earth Light Myself Present Sun
Again and again I tell God I need help, and God says, ‘Well, isn’t that fabulous? Because I need help too. So you go get that old woman over there some water, and I’ll figure out what we’re going to do about your stuff.
ANNE LAMOTT

God Need Water Woman Yourself
A good marriage is where both people feel like they’re getting the better end of the deal.
ANNE LAMOTT

Better Deal End Goodness Marriage People Yourself
Forgiveness is giving up all hope of having had a better past.
ANNE LAMOTT

Better Forgiveness Hope Past
People help you or you help them and when we offer or receive help, we take in each other. And then we are saved.
ANNE LAMOTT

Help Offering People Save Yourself
If we stay where we are, where we’re stuck, where we’re comfortable and safe, we die there… When nothing new can get in, that’s death.
ANNE LAMOTT

Comfortable Death Safety Stay
Sometimes I think that Jesus watches my neurotic struggles, and shakes his head and grips his forehead and starts tossing back mojitos.
ANNE LAMOTT

Drink Myself Start Struggle Thinking Time
Gratitude, not understanding, is the secret to joy and equanimity.
ANNE LAMOTT

Gratitude Happiness Joy Secret Understand
You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories.
ANNE LAMOTT

Story Yourself
You can safely assume that you’ve created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do.
ANNE LAMOTT

Assumption God Hate Image People Safety Yourself
You can get the monkey off your back, but the circus never leaves town.
ANNE LAMOTT

Advice Animal Circus Town Yourself
I do not at all understand the mystery of grace – only that it meets us where we are but does not leave us where it found us.
ANNE LAMOTT

Finding Leaving Mystery Understand Yourself
How do you begin? The answer is simple: you decide to.
ANNE LAMOTT

Beginning Decision Simplicity Yourself
Or you might shout at the top of your lungs or whisper into your sleeve, “I hate you, God.” That is a prayer too, because it is real, it is truth, and maybe it is the first sincere thought you’ve had in months.
ANNE LAMOTT

God Hate Prayer Sincere Thinking Yourself
Grace means you’re in a different universe from where you had been stuck, when you had absolutely no way to get there on your own.
ANNE LAMOTT

Different Grace Universe Yourself
Lighthouses don’t go running all over an island looking for boats to save; they just stand there shining.
ANNE LAMOTT

Light Run Save Shine Stand

I thought such awful thoughts that I cannot even say them out loud because they would make Jesus want to drink gin straight out of the cat dish.

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I thought such awful thoughts that I cannot even say them out loud because they would make Jesus want to drink gin straight out of the cat dish.

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