Why isn’t there a special name for the tops of your feet?
LILY TOMLINThere’s so much plastic in this culture that vinyl leopard skin is becoming an endangered synthetic.
More Lily Tomlin Quotes
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If beauty is truth, why don’t women go to the library to have their hair done?
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If you read a lot of books you are considered well read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you’re not considered well viewed.
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Don’t be afraid of missing opportunities. Behind every failure is an opportunity somebody wishes they had missed.
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Even when I’m being funny, I’m deadly serious.
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Does your mind feel more and more like teflon? Nothing sticks to it?
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I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.
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The best mind-altering drug is the truth.
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The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.
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What I appreciate is acknowledging to the audience that I think they have brains.
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Sometimes I feel like a figment of my own imagination.
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You are what you think, geez, that’s frightening.
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Exercise is for people who can’t handle drugs or alcohol.
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I bought a box of animal crackers, but there was nothing inside. They’d eaten each other.
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What goes up must come down. But don’t expect it to come down where you can find it.
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If I had known what it would be like to have it all – I might have been willing to settle for less.
LILY TOMLIN