Living with kids is like living with a bunch of drunks. You know you really have to be on your toes all the time. Things are falling over and breaking and spilling. If you live on the second story, you really have to keep the windows shut all the time.
TOM WAITSYou can learn a lot about a woman by getting smashed with her.
More Tom Waits Quotes
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it ain’t no sin, to take off your skin and dance around in your bones
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Well you say that it’s gospel, But I know that it’s only church.
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Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends.
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I do some acting. And there’s a difference between “I do some acting” and “I’m an actor.”
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But it’s so hard to dance that way when it’s cold and there’s no music.
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You got to tell me the brave captain Why are the wicked so strong? How do the angels get to sleep When the devil leaves the porch light on?
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All that you’ve loved is all you own.
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When your down on your luck and you’ve lost all your dreams theres nothing like a campfire and a can of beans.
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I sold a quart of blood and bought a half a pint of scotch.
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The average person spends two weeks over their lifetime waiting for the traffic light to change.
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If you get far enough away you’ll be on your way back home.
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Not the kind of wheel you fall asleep at.
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You’re innocent when you dream.
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I’ll tell you all my secrets but I lie about my past.
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I was always laughing in church.
TOM WAITS






