“You’re my North Star when I’m lost and feeling blue.”

Children make up the best songs, anyway. Better than grown-ups. Kids are always working on songs and throwing them away, like little origami things or paper airplanes. They don’t care if they lose it; they’ll just make another one.

I’ve been riding on the crest of a slump lately.

Never have your wallet with you onstage. It’s bad luck. You shouldn’t play the piano with money in your pocket. Play like you need the money.

The earth is not my home, I’m just passing by.

Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends.

Never trust a man in a blue trench coat, never drive a car when you’re dead.

Got a head full of lightning, a hat full of rain.

I’ll tell you all my secrets but I lie about my past.

I like Thelonious Monk, he’s so gnarled, he’s like a piece of machinery that’s pulled up the bolts on the floor and gone off on its own.

The dog won’t bite if you beat Him with a bone.

And the earth died screaming, while I lay dreaming.

Mostly I straddle reality and the imagination. My reality needs imagination like a bulb needs a socket. My imagination needs reality like a blind man needs a cane.

I put food on the table and roof overhead. But I’d trade it all tomorrow for the highway instead.

I’m not fighting for justice. I am not fighting for freedom. I am fighting for my life and another day in the world here.

Bill Hicks – blowtorch, excavator, truthsayer, and brain specialist. He will correct your vision. Others will drive on the road he built.

Well I got a bad liver and broken heart, yeah, I drunk me a river since you tore me apart.

If you look at my job, my union card, it says ‘actor.’ It don’t say nothing about celebrity, movie star, nothing like that, and that’s one thing that keeps me humble.

I sent out a tweet, ‘Dancing with the Stars’ should stop the jibber jabber.

I’ve never seen myself as a star. I never call myself a celebrity or a superstar, whatever.

I do live like a rock star, but it’s not as great as it sounds. It’s a lot of traveling.

That’s the beauty of being a straight-to-DVD star. It really helps you stay under the media’s radar.

I’m not going to get somewhere and say, ‘OK, I’m done.’ Success is never final; I’ll just keep on going.

The same way as failure never being fatal. Just keep going. I’m going to the stars and then past them.

On a clear day, how it will astound you That the glow of your feelings outshines every star.