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I don’t want to be a saint, I want a love I don’t fight alone to keep.

Schuyler

I allow myself to be a weathervane; receive every feeling that greets the shore of me.
SCHUYLER

Allow Feeling Greatness Myself
I’m remembering again, how loneliness has always made me brave.
SCHUYLER

Brave Lonely Myself Remember
Yes, this life is mine, but more often I watch it take place and my hands feel too far away to touch it.
SCHUYLER

Hands Life Myself Place Touch
I descend into an unopened sky, the ocean floor, the final embrace of a graveyard. Find your fill of me before my blue pales like a sour moon.
SCHUYLER

Floor Grave Moon Ocean Open Sky Yourself
I want to wade into the water on the sidewalk, crawl out of this feeling without giving it a name. Take a lighter to love’s sticky edges so its sadness isn’t caught in my throat.
SCHUYLER

Catch Myself Name Sadness Water
I will still live like a ghost in the mornings; walking, listening, pouring coffee to finish sometime by the afternoon, when I’ve had enough of watching the world and do all I can to live in it.
SCHUYLER

Enough Ghost Listening Morning Myself Walk
I’m thinking about how early the spring flower buds rise up from the grass; just barely on winter’s heels. How uncomfortable, how cold the soil must be, still half-frosted, when the roots start to take shape.
SCHUYLER

Comfortable Flower Myself Shape Start Thinking
I sit on the bare floor, leave my palms unturned, and watch relief pool into one hand, and uncertainty in the next. I will try not to lean more one way or another, but let them hold each other as company.
SCHUYLER

Company Floor Hands Leaving Myself Uncertain
Take me back to the evergreen trees; to the sunlight through the leaves, the bending ferns and fronds. The pitter of the rain, the smooth rocks sleeping under moss. Take me back to the life I know before this body.
SCHUYLER

Body Known Leaves Life Myself Sunlight Tree
Change is not a four letter curse word I once believed it to be.
SCHUYLER

Believe Change Curse Myself
I’m choosing to believe things are getting better again. The give and take of joy, remembering a few days of ache does not mean forever.
SCHUYLER

Believe Better Choice Forever Myself Remember
Hold me here, where I feel less like a stranger to my own laughter. Where it’s easier to believe things happen for a reason or maybe, at least, out of a thousand winding roads my life might take, I will still find one that fits me.
SCHUYLER

Feeling Hold Life Oneself Reason Road Stranger
I’d get lost in this green, ferns leaning against the trees, soil stuck to my feet, never dream of finding my way back again.
SCHUYLER

Dreams Lost Myself Tree Way
I know I could be an astronomer of this swooning.
SCHUYLER

Known Myself
I still know the fabric of where I begin and end.
SCHUYLER

Beginning End Fabric Myself
I don’t want to be a saint, I want a love I don’t fight alone to keep.
SCHUYLER

Alone Fight Love Myself Saint

I don’t want to be a saint, I want a love I don’t fight alone to keep.

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I don’t want to be a saint, I want a love I don’t fight alone to keep.

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