Though intelligence is powerless to modify character, it is a dab hand at finding euphemisms for its weaknesses.
QUENTIN CRISPExhibitionism is like a drug. Hooked in adolescence I was now taking doses so massive they would have killed a novice.
More Quentin Crisp Quotes
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Nothing shortens a journey so pleasantly as an account of misfortunes at which the hearer is permitted to laugh.
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I never saw Portsmouth by day.
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I don’t like peas, and I’m glad I don’t like them, because if I liked them I would eat them and I hate them.
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If Mr. Vincent Price were to be co-starred with Miss Bette Davis in a story by Mr. Edgar Allan Poe directed by Mr. Roger Corman, it could not fully express the pent-up violence and depravity of a single day in the life of the average family.
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The English think that incompetence is the same thing as sincerity.
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Look inward and ask not if there is anything outside you want, but whether there is anything inside that you have not yet unpacked.
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Politics are not an instrument for effecting social change; they are the art of making the inevitable appear to be a matter of wise human choice.
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The very purpose of existence is to reconcile the glowing opinion we hold of ourselves with the appalling things that other people think about us.
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Ask yourself, if there was to be no blame, and if there was to be no praise, who would I be then?
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I’ve never not been famous.
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An autobiography is an obituary in serial form with the last installment missing.
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The world now seems a stunningly ignoble place. It has not really grown all that much worse but appears to have done so because we know so much more about it than we did.
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Assoon as I stepped out of my mother’s womb on to dry land, I realized that I had made a mistake?but the trouble with children is that they are not returnable.
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Never sweep. After four years the dirt gets no worse.
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And were then to lay his own garden path diagonally from one corner to the other, that man’s soul would be lost. Originality is only to be praised when not prefaced by the look to right and left.
QUENTIN CRISP