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I enjoy making people laugh. The trick is to tell them jokes against yourself. If you praise yourself, your stories aren’t funny.

Michael Caine

The basic rule of human nature is that powerful people speak slowly and subservient people quickly – because if they don’t speak fast enough, nobody will listen to them.
MICHAEL CAINE

Enough Fast Human Listening Nature People Powerful Rule Speak
A man’s body may grow old, but inside his spirit can still be as young and as restless as ever.
MICHAEL CAINE

Body Growth Man Old Spirit Young
A man should dress in a way that you don’t notice. He looks good and you don’t know why. But it’s the tailoring, the materials, and the clothes.
MICHAEL CAINE

Clothes Himself Man Material Notice Way
Use the difficulties – if you can’t avoid them
MICHAEL CAINE

Avoid Choice Difficult Inspirational Perspective Yourself
In my opinion, everybody is getting older and older. We have a great deal of dementia because nobody grew old enough to get it.
MICHAEL CAINE

Enough Greatness Myself Old Opinion
You’ve got to be flexible. Directors do a massive amount of planning and homework, and if after all that your director decides to throw it all out of the window and shoot spontaneously, then you must follow his lead.
MICHAEL CAINE

Director Follow Home Leadership Planning Window Yourself
I read books like mad, but I am careful to to let anything I read influence me.
MICHAEL CAINE

Book Influence Mad Myself Reading
I enjoy making people laugh. The trick is to tell them jokes against yourself. If you praise yourself, your stories aren’t funny.
MICHAEL CAINE

Enjoyment Funny Laughter People Praise Story Yourself
You can’t get blase about something you haven’t done yet.
MICHAEL CAINE

Action Work Yourself
Be like a duck. Calm on the surface, but always paddling like the dickens underneath.
MICHAEL CAINE

Calm Hard Work Hustle Myself Surface
Do I believe in God? Yes I do. When you’ve had a life like mine, you have to.
MICHAEL CAINE

Believe God Life Yourself
Hollywood is a cross between a health farm, a recreation center and an insane asylum. It’s a company town, and I happen to like the company!
MICHAEL CAINE

Character Company Health Myself Nature Recreation
I prefer to remake flops. Dirty Rotten Scoundrels was a remake of a flop, and The Quiet American is a remake of a flop.
MICHAEL CAINE

Choice Movie Myself Preference Repeat
My father was a fish market porter. So I grew up on fish, because he used to steal one a day, I grew up on the very best fish that money could buy, ’cause he only stole the good stuff.
MICHAEL CAINE

Father Food Goodness Growth Money Myself Occupation Steal
Books were my window on the world. Growing up at the Elephant and Castle, which was very rough, my paradise was the library.
MICHAEL CAINE

Book Castle Library Myself Window World
I always exposed the weakness rather than the nastiness.
MICHAEL CAINE

Myself Nasty Weakness

I enjoy making people laugh. The trick is to tell them jokes against yourself. If you praise yourself, your stories aren’t funny.

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I enjoy making people laugh. The trick is to tell them jokes against yourself. If you praise yourself, your stories aren’t funny.

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