I wish I was better looking.
MEL BROOKSImmortality is a by-product of good work.
More Mel Brooks Quotes
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We’re all blessed with a lot of timidity and a lot of worry and anxiety, and vanity is a good antidote.
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We rest our case on the production numbers.
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Well, you know, ‘Spaceballs’ is a weird combination, because it’s a simple, sweet little fairytale, and it’s crazy and out-there and making fun of and taking apart sci-fi, ‘Star Wars’, and ‘Star Trek’.
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I’m rather secular. I’m basically Jewish. But I think I’m Jewish not because of the Jewish religion at all.
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I only direct in self-defense.
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All short women have a delayed fuse. Marry a taller woman: My wife was an inch or two taller than me; it’s a sign of security.
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As far as songwriters, I’ve always been a fan of Irving Berlin, Cole Porter, and George Gershwin; those guys mean a lot to me.
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When you come to Germany as a Jew you have an uneasy feeling, but I’ve always felt okay in Berlin.
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It’s talent. Either you got it or you ain’t.
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The brilliance of Max Brooks is that he always quotes authorities at the back of his books that never existed. Like a Russian professor he made up that validates a story or character.
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He who hesitates is poor.
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Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die.
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If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets.
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My job is to go out and entertain the most people possible.
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I like Chris Rock. He’s dangerous.
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But I have bad taste with a deep fount of intellectuality.
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Anybody can direct, but there are only eleven good writers.
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A cinema villain essentially needs a moustache so he can twiddle with it gleefully as he cooks up his next nasty plan.
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I loved Westerns as a little kid, and I loved horror films.
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I don’t believe in this business of being behind, better to be in front.
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If you’re quiet, you’re not living. You’ve got to be noisy and colorful and lively.
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We want to get people laughing; we don’t want to offend anybody.
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Every human being has hundreds of separate people living under his skin.
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I don’t have a mission. I don’t have a torch to burn.
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As long as the world is turning and spinning, we’re gonna be dizzy and we’re gonna make mistakes.
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If presidents can’t do it to their wives, they do it to their country.
MEL BROOKS