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I want a house that has got over all its troubles; I don’t want to spend the rest of my life bringing up a young and inexperienced house.

Jerome K. Jerome

What the eye does not see, the stomach does not get upset over
JEROME K. JEROME

Eye Over Stomach Upset
They [dogs] never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation.
JEROME K. JEROME

Dog Funny Silly
Cultivate a sense of humour. From a humorous point of view this lunch is rather good.
JEROME K. JEROME

Humorous Lunch View
Evil thought is a dangerous pet. It is safer to play with it from behind the iron bars of circumstance.
JEROME K. JEROME

Evil Iron Play
But who wants to be foretold the weather? It is bad enough when it comes, without our having the misery of knowing about it beforehand.
JEROME K. JEROME

Knowing Misery Weather
Swearing relieves the feelings – that is what swearing does. I explained this to my aunt on one occasion, but it didn’t answer with her. She said I had no business to have such feelings.
JEROME K. JEROME

Aunt Funny Humorous
I can’t sit still and see another man slaving and working. I want to get up and superintend, and walk round with my hands in my pockets, and tell him what to do. It is my energetic nature. I can’t help it.
JEROME K. JEROME

Hand Men Pocket
What I am looking for is a blessing not in disguise.
JEROME K. JEROME

Fake Happiness Humor People
It seems to me so shocking to see the precious hours of a man’s life – the priceless moments that will never come back to him again – being wasted in a mere brutish sleep.
JEROME K. JEROME

Men Priceless Sleep
I want a house that has got over all its troubles; I don’t want to spend the rest of my life bringing up a young and inexperienced house.
JEROME K. JEROME

Home House Life
A good woman’s arms round a man’s neck is a lifebelt thrown out to him from heaven.
JEROME K. JEROME

Good Heaven Women
I should never make anything of a fisherman. I had not got sufficient imagination
JEROME K. JEROME

Lake Rivers Sea
The proverbial Englishman, we know from old chronicler Froissart, takes his pleasures sadly, and the Englishwoman goes a step further and takes her pleasures in sadness itself.
JEROME K. JEROME

Funny Humorous Sadness
People who have tried it, tell me that a clear conscience makes you very happy and contented; but a full stomach does the business quite as well, and is cheaper, and more easily obtained.
JEROME K. JEROME

Business Doe People
Cassivelaunus had prepared the river for Caesar, by planting it full of stakes (and had, no doubt, put up a notice-board).
JEROME K. JEROME

Boards Doubt River
It is always the best policy to speak the truth, unless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar.
JEROME K. JEROME

Exceptionally Funny Liar Truth

I want a house that has got over all its troubles; I don’t want to spend the rest of my life bringing up a young and inexperienced house.

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I want a house that has got over all its troubles; I don’t want to spend the rest of my life bringing up a young and inexperienced house.

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