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Waking your kids up for school the first day after a break is almost as much fun as birthing them was.

Jenny McCarthy

I wished to God the doctor had handed me a pamphlet that said, ‘Hey, sorry about the autism, but here’s a step-by-step list on what to do next.’ But doctors don’t do that. They say ‘sorry’ and move you along.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Doctors Moving Sorry
I’m so scared girls look at my breast implants and think, ‘To get boys, you need big boobs.’ I tell them, ‘Don’t get it done. Those fears go away. You develop other insecurities, but breasts aren’t one of them.’ I want to get them half-size.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Boys Girl Thinking
Corner one of the hundreds of doctors who specialize in autism recovery, and they’ll tell you stories of dozens of kids in their practice who no longer have autism. Ask them to speak to the press and they’ll run for the door. They know better.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Kids Recovery Running
Waking your kids up for school the first day after a break is almost as much fun as birthing them was.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Fun Humor School
I did want to acknowledge and confirm the fact that my son does, indeed, have an autism diagnosis.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Autism Son Want
I’m not a sex symbol.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Appeal Object Sex Symbols
Obviously, I’m not a trained actress, and right now I’ll come out and say I’m glad I’m not.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Actresses Glad Right Now
I figured out something spiritual. Billboard this: ‘Life is supposed to be fun!’
JENNY MCCARTHY

Fun Life Spiritual
The reason why [the medical community] is reluctant to talk about it is because there’s such a huge business in pharmaceuticals.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Autism Community Reason Why
If you give us a safe vaccine, we’ll use it. It shouldn’t be polio versus autism.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Autism Polio Vaccine Versus
I’m not as hard on myself anymore. I’m comfortable exactly where I am, though it took me until I was 34 years old! I still have things I’m really insecure about, but I’ve changed by loving me – C-section scars, stretch marks, and all.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Insecure Scar Years
Almost everyone has or will experience getting dumped in their lifetime. Unless, of course, you’re a nun. Jesus can’t dump nuns.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Dump Jesus Lifetime
People don’t see this side of me. They don’t know I read, like, 800 million spiritual books. Lately I am just really getting into a lot of spirituality.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Book People Spiritual
My philosophy of dating is to just fart right away.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Dating Philosophy Women
It can be hard for the cute girl. I was blond, cute, broke. I was beat up. I was thrown inside lockers. I was burned with cigarettes. My hair was lit on fire.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Cute Fire Girl
Why should 20-year-olds only be considered sexy? I think we get better with age.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Birthday Sexy Thinking

Waking your kids up for school the first day after a break is almost as much fun as birthing them was.

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Waking your kids up for school the first day after a break is almost as much fun as birthing them was.

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