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My philosophy of dating is to just fart right away.

Jenny McCarthy

I guess now that I think back, I used to play priest and be a funny priest. I don’t know, I grew up in such a Catholic family that I kind of liked to test the boundaries a little bit and I think I had fun watching my mom laugh.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Funny Mom Thinking
All those girls who were mean to me[in high school], I pay them back by going through the drive-through window and asking for my burger. That feels really great.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Girl Mean School
I can’t even begin to tell you how many casting couches I was attacked on. Not just by casting people, but by stars. And when I wouldn’t give them my number, they’d say, “Who the hell do you think you are? You will never make it in this town. I’ll make sure of it.”
JENNY MCCARTHY

Number Stars Thinking
I figured out something spiritual. Billboard this: ‘Life is supposed to be fun!’
JENNY MCCARTHY

Fun Life Spiritual
I look at autism like a bus accident, and you don’t become cured from a bus accident, but you can recover.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Autism Jenny Looks
I deserve to be happy and I think a lot of people stay in relationships for wrong reasons and instead of just looking at each other and just saying, ‘you know, it’s like sands of the hourglass, we learned our lessons, we can end in war or we can end in peace.’
JENNY MCCARTHY

Breakup Thinking War
For a seriously autistic kid, the best prognosis might be getting into a mainstream school without being too much of a shadow. For a moderately autistic kid the best prognosis is full recovery.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Kids Recovery School
I didn’t have to work out before 35 but now I have to.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Five Out Thirty Work
It can be hard for the cute girl. I was blond, cute, broke. I was beat up. I was thrown inside lockers. I was burned with cigarettes. My hair was lit on fire.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Cute Fire Girl
I have my once-a-month nachos, but it’s soy cheese and turkey chili on it, so it’s somewhat safe. But it’s still a big vice for me, because I have a big bowl of it.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Cheese Country Nachos Vices
My philosophy of dating is to just fart right away.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Dating Philosophy Women
What are friends for? They are the ultimate reflection of yourself. Always surround yourself with people who inspire you and return the favor by giving them the best of you.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Giving People Reflection
When I was a little girl, rocking my little dolls, I remember thinking I would be the world’s best mom, and so far I’ve done it.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Girl Mom Thinking
Almost everyone has or will experience getting dumped in their lifetime. Unless, of course, you’re a nun. Jesus can’t dump nuns.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Dump Jesus Lifetime
Just keep trying, and your dreams will come true. But you have to give it all your time, effort, and soul.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Dream Effort Giving
I love Botox, I absolutely love it. I get it minimally so I can still move my face. But I really do think it’s a savior.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Botox Moving Thinking

My philosophy of dating is to just fart right away.

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My philosophy of dating is to just fart right away.

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