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My philosophy of dating is to just fart right away.

Jenny McCarthy

I usually have my protein at lunch and my carbs at night – I don’t mix protein and carbs.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Carbs Lunch Night
All those girls who were mean to me[in high school], I pay them back by going through the drive-through window and asking for my burger. That feels really great.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Girl Mean School
If you ask 99.9 percent of parents who have children with autism if we’d rather have the measles versus autism, we’d sign up for the measles.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Children Parent
I deserve to be happy and I think a lot of people stay in relationships for wrong reasons and instead of just looking at each other and just saying, ‘you know, it’s like sands of the hourglass, we learned our lessons, we can end in war or we can end in peace.’
JENNY MCCARTHY

Breakup Thinking War
I’m so scared girls look at my breast implants and think, ‘To get boys, you need big boobs.’ I tell them, ‘Don’t get it done. Those fears go away. You develop other insecurities, but breasts aren’t one of them.’ I want to get them half-size.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Boys Girl Thinking
The idea that vaccines are a primary cause of autism is not as crackpot as some might wish. Autism’s 60-fold rise in 30 years matches a tripling of the US vaccine schedule.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Ideas Vaccines Years
When I first went public with my son Evan’s story, I just planned to talk about the ‘R’ word – Recovery. But soon I was spending most my time talking about the ‘V’ word – vaccines.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Recovery Son Talking
I’m not a sex symbol.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Appeal Object Sex Symbols
I guess now that I think back, I used to play priest and be a funny priest. I don’t know, I grew up in such a Catholic family that I kind of liked to test the boundaries a little bit and I think I had fun watching my mom laugh.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Funny Mom Thinking
Kids will not listen to that. They’re going to experiment no matter what, so you have to be honest.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Honest Kids Matter
Hope is the greatest thing for moms of autism. Hope is what gets us out of bed in the morning. I’m on a mission to tell parents that there is a way.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Hope Mom Morning
I have my once-a-month nachos, but it’s soy cheese and turkey chili on it, so it’s somewhat safe. But it’s still a big vice for me, because I have a big bowl of it.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Cheese Country Nachos Vices
If you give us a safe vaccine, we’ll use it. It shouldn’t be polio versus autism.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Autism Polio Vaccine Versus
No I don’t have a sex tape and I’m kind of upset that I don’t. You know why? ‘Cause I’m really good.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Sex Tape Upset
Almost everyone has or will experience getting dumped in their lifetime. Unless, of course, you’re a nun. Jesus can’t dump nuns.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Dump Jesus Lifetime
Without a doubt in my mind, I believe that vaccinations triggered Evan’s autism.
JENNY MCCARTHY

Autism Believe Doubt

My philosophy of dating is to just fart right away.

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My philosophy of dating is to just fart right away.

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