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Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?

James Thurber

The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself.
JAMES THURBER

Funny Himself Person Smart World
She wasn’t much to look at but she was something to think about.
JAMES THURBER

Instagram Captions Philosophy Thinking
Beautiful things don’t ask for attention.
JAMES THURBER

Attention Beautiful One Liner
I am not a cat man, but a dog man, and all felines can tell this at a glance – a sharp, vindictive glance.
JAMES THURBER

Man Myself Sharp
Love is what you’ve been through with somebody.
JAMES THURBER

Break Up Love Yourself
The past is an old armchair in the attic, the present an ominous ticking sound, and the future is anybody’s guess.
JAMES THURBER

Future Guess Past Sound
Man is flying too fast for a world that is round. Soon he will catch up with himself in a great rear end collision.
JAMES THURBER

Collision Fly Greatness Man World
If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.
JAMES THURBER

Belief Dog Heaven Immortal Known Myself Person
With sixty staring me in the face, I have developed inflammation of the sentence structure and definite hardening of the paragraphs.
JAMES THURBER

Definite Development Face Myself Structure
Two is company, four is a party, three is a crowd. One is a wanderer.
JAMES THURBER

Company Crowd Party Travel Wanderer
The things we laugh at are awful while they are going on, but get funny when we look back. And other people laugh because they’ve been through it too. The closest thing to humor is tragedy.
JAMES THURBER

Laughter People Tragedy
Don’t count your boobies until they are hatched.
JAMES THURBER

Body Count Patience Yourself
Discussion in America means dissent.
JAMES THURBER

Country Discussion
There are two kinds of light – the glow that illuminates, and the glare that obscures.
JAMES THURBER

Deep Glow Illumination Kind Light
Writers of comedy have outlook, whereas writers of tragedy have, according to them, insight.
JAMES THURBER

Insight Tragedy Wisdom Writing
I do not have a psychiatrist and I do not want one, for the simple reason that if he listened to me long enough, he might become disturbed.
JAMES THURBER

Disturb Himself Listening Reason

Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?

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Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?

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