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Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?

James Thurber

For one thing, she pronounced flowers ‘flars’ and I couldn’t let it slide.
JAMES THURBER

Accent Ignore Language Pronounce
With sixty staring me in the face, I have developed inflammation of the sentence structure and definite hardening of the paragraphs.
JAMES THURBER

Definite Development Face Myself Structure
I was seized by the stern hand of Compulsion, that dark, unreasonable Urge that impels women to clean house in the middle of the night.
JAMES THURBER

Cleaning Hands Night Reason
The most dangerous food is wedding cake.
JAMES THURBER

Cake Dangerous Food Marriage One Liner Sarcasm
Let us not look back in anger, nor forward in fear, but around in awareness.
JAMES THURBER

Angry Awareness Fear Future Past
I never really rallied after the birth of my first child.
JAMES THURBER

Born Children Myself
Discussion in America means dissent.
JAMES THURBER

Country Discussion
The nation that complacently and fearfully allows its artists and writers to become suspected rather than respected is no longer regarded as a nation possessed with humor or depth.
JAMES THURBER

Allow Fear Humor Nation Possession Regard Suspect Writing
You might as well fall flat on your face as lean over too far backward.
JAMES THURBER

Face Fall Yourself
The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself.
JAMES THURBER

Funny Himself Person Smart World
Don’t count your boobies until they are hatched.
JAMES THURBER

Body Count Patience Yourself
A burden in the bush is worth two on your hands.
JAMES THURBER

Burden Hands Worth
Things have dropped from me. I have outlived certain desires; I have lost friends, some by death… others through sheer inability to cross the street.
JAMES THURBER

Cross Desire Friendship Lost Street
I always begin at the left with the opening word of the sentence and read toward the right and I recommend this method.
JAMES THURBER

Beginning Method Myself Open Word
I don’t believe the writer should know too much where he’s going. If he does, he runs into old man blueprintold man propaganda.
JAMES THURBER

Believe Man Myself Old Writing
A false or misunderstood word may create as much disaster as a sudden thoughtless act.
JAMES THURBER

Act Creation Fake Misunderstanding Thinking

Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?

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Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?

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