“We are not that flash, me or the missus. In fact, we are quite low-maintenance.”

I love fatherhood. I could bang on about kids forever.

We can all be conned but at what point do we realize that we’re being conned and to what point do we allow ourselves to be conned?

If you change the rules on what controls you… you will change the rules on what you can control.

I can understand that the whole world is interested in my wife Madonna. That’s even why I married her.

I think it’s that much harder to make a good comedy than it is straight and apparently serious.

I like to think that we’ve got a plan, so let’s stick to it. That said, once we’ve stuck to it, we’re allowed as much improvisation as anyone cares to indulge themselves in.

I suppose directing on set is the most fun because it’s a good crack and you feel you’re on the battlefield whereas writing is a fairly solitary undertaking.

I don’t like the idea of agents in a typical form. The idea of agents, to me, brings up the idea of a man in a very boring suit who’s not very good looking and doesn’t have much attention to style.

I’m not under too much of an illusion of how smart or un-smart I am because filmmaking ultimately is about teamwork.

It’s not easy to strap yourself down to a desk and bash on a keyboard when you know you can direct lots of films, because directing films is fun and interactive and gregarious. Writing isn’t.

One of the interesting and exciting things about my job is watching technological ground being pioneered.

I got too fed up with films that didn’t make you think. I liked the idea of one that you’d have to be dancing around with. I like my mind to be engaged when I watch a film.

I’d like to work with the missus, but there’s nothing in the pipeline at the moment.

Previously, on Lock, Stock, I went to bed at two in the morning and woke up at five in the morning, and on this one I was known to nod off on the set occasionally.

I like death. I’m a big fan of it.

I’m not politically motivated. I used to be – passionately. I used to be very Left wing. Then I went very Right wing, and now I rest somewhere in the middle.

If I tried to write that it would just be false. Or I’d have someone enter with a machine gun.

My Beloved One gleams like the lightning flash in the sky.

My daughter is not an object to flash around or a prized item to put on display.

At some point, a flash of sustained clarity reveals the difference between what someone would have you believe is true,

What a photograph shows us is how a particular thing could be seen, or could be made to look – at a specific moment, in a specific context, by a specific photographer employing specific tools.

The past is always with us, in the form of our photographs, which we feel as we might a rosary, wearing them smooth with the fingering of our eyes.

Katy Perry still gets me every time. She’s very funny in person! We met at the Teen Choice Awards and she pulled my cheeks apart and told me how cute I was. My life was literally flashing before my eyes!

Thoughts on a tapestry. Colour or black and white. A brush, a pen, A flash of light. Ideas flowing soon, about to take flight.