Great humorists are great insulters.
DICK CAVETTI confess, I do have to remind myself almost daily that there are people on this earth capable of reading, writing, eating and dressing themselves who believe their lives are ruled from billions of miles away, by the stars – and, of course, the planets.
More Dick Cavett Quotes
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Its fun for me to go on other folks talk shows. When youve endured the ups and downs and tensions and pitfalls of hosting, being a guest is a piece of angel food.
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There should be three days a week when no one is allowed to say: ‘What’s your sign?’ Violators would have their copies of Kahlil Gibran confiscated.
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I’m not freakishly short. I had, on my show, used shortness as a joke subject; it didn’t really bother me.
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My IQ is somewhere between Spiro Agnew’s and Albert Einstein’s.
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Teaching is an art and a profession requiring years of training.
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I have yet to see one of those Comedy Central shows with multiple standup comics that doesn’t include someone the size of the Hindenburg.
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You can, after all, reduce the reasons for watching TV to but two: to be lulled, and to be stimulated. Some people do one sometimes, the other sometimes. Some people do all of one or all of the other.
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It was at a vividly bad time in Norman Mailer’s life that I met him, and a sort of water-treading time in mine. He had stabbed his wife, and I was a copy boy at Time magazine.
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In the main, ghosts are said to be forlorn and generally miserable, if not downright depressed. The jolly ghost is rare.
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Why are sex and violence always linked? I’m afraid they’ll blur together in people’s minds – sexandviolence – until we can’t tell them apart. I expect to hear a newscaster say, “The mob became unruly and the police were forced to resort to sex.”
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Lawyers work hard and, like us, they’re human, many of them.
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Every time I nostalgically try to regain my liking of John McCain, he reaches into his sleaze bag and pulls out something malodorous.
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Sloppy language leads to sloppy thought, and sloppy thought to sloppy legislation.
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Home schooling as an idea is on a par with home dentistry.
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I haven’t ever found any great writing on that wonderful and often unappreciated art form, the insult.
DICK CAVETT