“True patriotism hates injustice in its own land more than anywhere else.”

Scopes isn’t on trial; civilization is on trial.

Justice has nothing to do with what goes on in a courtroom; Justice is what comes out of a courtroom

Autobiography is never entirely true. No one can get the right perspective on himself. Every fact is colored by imagination and dream.

I do not believe in god because I do not believe in Mother Goose.

The first half of our lives are ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.

To think is to differ.

I knew that it is out of the question to have honest, economical government while a few are inordinately rich and the great mass of men are poor. In fact, it is to be doubted if anything really worthwhile can be done until there is a fairer distribution of wealth.

There are two things that kill a genius – a fatal disease and contentment.

Even if you do learn to speak correct English, whom are you going to speak it to?

I never wanted to see anybody die, but there are a few obituary notices I have read with pleasure.

I am always suspicious of righteous indignation. Nothing is more cruel than righteous indignation.

Working people have alot of bad habits, but the worst of these is work.

I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure – that is all that agnosticism means.

Probably the undertaker thinks less of death than almost any other man. He is so accustomed to it that his mind must involuntarily turn from its horror to a contemplation of how much he makes out of the burial.

A criminal is someone without the capital to incorporate

The law does not pretend to punish everything that is dishonest. That would seriously interfere with business.

My problem is that people get intimidated by someone big and beautiful like me. They hate to think I can be smart as well.

Truth hates delay. (Veritas odit moras.)

As long as you hate, there will be people to hate.

I hate high heels, more than anything.

Those who enjoy the emotion of hating are much like the groups who sate their thirst for blood by hunting and hounding to death helpless animals as an outlet for their emotions.

Some [actors] are really a pain in the ass today. I held out on getting an assistant forever because I didn’t want to seem demanding… or like a pain in the ass. I didn’t want someone working for me to hate me.

I don’t like spinach, and I’m glad I don’t, because if I liked it I’d eat it, and I just hate it.

Physical deformity, calls forth our charity. But the infinite misfortune of moral deformity calls forth nothing but hatred and vengeance.