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Never in my life did I think I would be congratulated by Mick Jagger for achieving anything.

Boris Johnson

It is easy to make promises – it is hard work to keep them.
BORIS JOHNSON

Easy Hard Work Promise
I have as much chance of becoming Prime Minister as of being decapitated by a frisbee or of finding Elvis.
BORIS JOHNSON

Becoming Chance Redneck
Voting Tory will cause your wife to have bigger breasts and increase your chances of owning a BMW M3.
BORIS JOHNSON

Chance Reason Vote Wife Yourself
Do you seriously propose that they are going to be so insane as to allow tariffs to be imposed. The EU is, I’m afraid a job destroying engine.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Europe Jobs
I have come to the conclusion that Tony Blair has finally gone mad … he made assertions that are so jaw-droppingly and breathtakingly at variance with reality that he surely needs professional psychiatric help.
BORIS JOHNSON

Conclusion Mad Need Professional Reality
My speaking style was criticised by no less an authority than Arnold Schwarzenegger. It was a low moment, my friends, to have my rhetorical skills denounced by a monosyllabic Austrian cyborg.
BORIS JOHNSON

Criticism Low Moments Skills Style Talk
I’m no communist.I’m a tax cutting Conservative. But I want a capitalism that is fairer to forgotten people.
BORIS JOHNSON

Cutting People Want
It hasn’t taken them long, they began by telling us they would have a positive and patriotic case and they’re back to project fear within minutes. There they go again they have nothing positive to say.
BORIS JOHNSON

Beginning Fear Positive Talk
Plus I think she can articulate what’s needed at the moment, which is a bit of an antidote to some of the gloom and negativity and misunderstanding about what the Brexit vote means.
BORIS JOHNSON

Misunderstanding Moment Negativity
Dark forces dragged me away from the keyboard, swirling forces of irresistible intensity and power.
BORIS JOHNSON

Darkness Force Intense Power
Since January 1993 there have been 27 other countries not in the EU that have done better than the UK at exporting goods into the single market.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Done January
The dreadful truth is that when people come to see their MP, they have run out of better ideas.
BORIS JOHNSON

Better Ideas People Truth
I am supporting David Cameron purely out of cynical self-interest.
BORIS JOHNSON

Interest Myself Pure Support
It is easy to make promises – it is hard work to keep them.
BORIS JOHNSON

Easy Hard Promise Work
I dont see why people are so snooty about Channel Five. It has some respectable documentaries about the Second World War. It also devotes considerable airtime to investigations into lap-dancing, and other related and vital subjects
BORIS JOHNSON

Dance Documentary People Respect War World
He is like some sherry-crazed old dowager who has lost the family silver at roulette, and who now decides to double up by betting the house as well.
BORIS JOHNSON

Business Debt House

Never in my life did I think I would be congratulated by Mick Jagger for achieving anything.

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Never in my life did I think I would be congratulated by Mick Jagger for achieving anything.

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