I don’t answer fan mail. I don’t have time for that. It’s like hundreds of thousands of people who think they’re going to become millionaires getting autographs from movie actors. I don’t have time for those idiots. I’ve got stuff to do.
BILL MURRAYI was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster, drank piña coladas. At sunset, we made love like sea otters. That was a pretty good day. Why couldn’t I get that day over and over and over?
More Bill Murray Quotes
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You’re supposed to have one hand up and one hand down. As you’re trying to going up, you’re trying to pull someone up at the same time.
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Friendship is so weird. You just pick a human you’ve met and you’re like, ‘Yep, I like this one,’ and you just do stuff with them.
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You want my dark side? Have I ever stolen anything? Not so much intentionally. But I don’t think it’s so much stealing as… being a part of the flow of the universe.
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I’ve got kids and that’s important. It’s funny, you think that there’s an expiration date on them and there just isn’t.
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There’s definitely a lot of trash that comes with the prize of being famous. It’s a nice gift, but there’s a lot of wrapping and paper and junk to cut through.
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Religion is the worst enemy of mankind. No single war in the history of humanity has killed as many people as religion has.
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I would jump into the middle of the street and say, “excuse me, there’s a Mercedes that’s got to get through here.” And I would push people out of the way, “get out of the way! Let him through!” Smacking their cars and stuff. Just like, “whack” and you just jump into it.
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I try to be available for life to happen to me. We’re in this life, and if you’re not available, the sort of ordinary time goes past and you didn’t live it. But if you’re available, life gets huge. You’re really living it.
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Just beat my record for most consecutive days without dying.
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If you walk up to some random person on the street, grab them by the shoulder, and say ‘Did you just see what I saw?!’, you’ll find that no-one wants to talk to you.
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I really don’t know what’s going to come out of my mouth.
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You’ll never be good if you don’t know that you are.
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I met a woman who photographed celebrity dogs for a book, and she told me that Ralph Lauren’s dog is named Rugby. I said, Yeah, but his real name is Stickball.
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I knew that’s where I was going. I knew we were going to Italy. You couldn’t make this movie in America at this price. I knew it was going to be big. I knew there was going to be a ship involved and that there was going to be a set as big as the ship.
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It just doesn’t matter if we win or we lose. IT JUST DOESN’T MATTER! It just doesn’t matter! It just doesn’t matter!
BILL MURRAY