“The more self-centered and egotistical a guy is, the better ballplayer he’s going to be.”

I would change policy, bring back natural grass and nickel beer. Baseball is the belly-button of our society. Straighten out baseball, and you straighten out the rest of the world.

Pretty soon you’re convinced that you will never die. When that happens I guess it is time to look for help before your life becomes one long, lost weekend.

The most important question regarding Big Data at almost any company is: How much are your customers really worth?

You realize that no matter how much you punish yourself, you always seem to wake up the next day.

You have only two hemispheres in your brain – a left and a right side. The left side controls the right side of your body and the right controls the left half. It’s a fact. Therefore, left-handers are the only people in their right minds.

I’m mad at Hank Aaron for deciding to play one more season. I threw him his last home run and thought I’d be remembered forever. Now, I’ll have to throw him another.

Alcohol is like anything else. It’s only as bad as the person it’s being poured into. If it’s used to heighten an occasion, or to take an edge off stress, I don’t see a problem.

Smoking’s a way to let you down slowly from a ballgame. It also makes you use less of the resources around. It makes people better in the way they act towards society. Everybody’s nicer. It’s hard to be mean when you’re stoned.

You take a team with twenty-five assholes and I’ll show you a pennant. I’ll show you the New York Yankees.

It’s hard not to be romantic about baseball

I never took the game home with me. I always left it in some bar.

Every baseball crowd, like every theatre audience, has its own distinctive attitude and atmosphere.

The two most important things in life are good friends and a strong bullpen.

I would change policy, bring back natural grass and nickel beer. Baseball is the belly-button of our society. Straighten out baseball, and you straighten out the rest of the world.

I always wanted to do a baseball book; I love baseball. The problem is that a very large part of my following is in non-baseball playing countries.

Writing is like anything – baseball playing, piano playing, sewing, hammering nails. The more you work on it, the better you get. But it seems to take a longer time to get better at writing than hammering nails.

A game of great charm in the adoption of mathematical measurements to the timing of human movements, the exactitudes and adjustments of physical ability to hazardous chance.