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I sold my soul to rock ‘n’ roll.

Bette Midler

I haven’t left my house in days. I watch the news channels incessantly. All the news stories are about the election; all the commercials are Viagra and Cialis. Election, erection, election, erection! Either way we’re screwed!
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House News Stories Watches
I think the essence of humor has not changed. It’s all about surprise, facilitating follows. But the context of humor has changed.
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Essence Issues Thinking
A lot of people started drinking martinis and smoking cigarettes because they felt it was cool.
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Cigarettes Cool Smoking
When it’s three o’clock in New York, it’s still 1938 in London.
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Humorous Inspirational New York
We’re all divine, but I was the only one who had the nerve to call myself that.
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Divine Myself Nerves
Self-esteem is something you have to earn! The only way to achieve self-esteem is to work hard. People have an obligation to live up to their potential.
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Hard People Self Esteem Work
I have a ball – and it keeps my heart rate up. I get to wear fabulous clothes. I get to make people laugh. That’s my core business, and that’s where I’ll always return.
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Clothes Heart People
When I read that, I burst into tears. It was so generous and so basic. Not fluffy. I can’t understand why we scrimp on education and shortchange our kids. Why would the citizenry do that to the people who are going to inherit its republic?
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Country Generous Kids Shortchange Understand
Men’s brains are smaller than those of women so they can fit into their penises.
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Brain Fit Men
I read a comment that made me think I should stop singing for a while. And I didn’t want to stop singing, because it was the only thing I loved. At first I thought,
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Please Singing Thinking
I fear for the future of the planet. But in a funny way, I’m even sanguine about that.
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Planets Sanguine Way
Everyone goes through their winters and springs, and their summers and autumns.
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Autumn Spring Summer
Most people don’t deserve to be spoken of in the same breath as Chaplin or Lucille Ball.
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Balls People
I think most of us are torn. We have at least two people at war in our body. One person wants to retire and grow fabulous tomatoes, and the other wants to stand up on a pedestal and be worshipped and get bigger and bigger and bigger until she explodes.
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Thinking Two War
I have my standards. They’re low, but I have them.
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Low Lows Standards
When the movies first started, audiences were dumbstruck to see actresses walking around in evening gowns. They’d never seen anything like that. They wanted to be like those actors and actresses, so the movies informed their behavior.
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Drinking People Smoking

I sold my soul to rock ‘n’ roll.

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I sold my soul to rock ‘n’ roll.

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