I’m partly somebody else trying to fit in and say the right things and do the right thing and be in the right place and wear what everybody else is wearing.

BEATRICE SPARKS

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I’m partly somebody else trying to fit in and say the right things and do the right thing and be in the right place and wear what everybody else is wearing.

Beatrice Sparks

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Bagwalas

They don’t think “I care,” “I hurt,” or “I have feelings.” It just seems like I’m always “wrong,” always “selfish,” always “self-centered” and everything else that’s negative and destructive.

BEATRICE SPARKS

They don’t think “I care,” “I hurt,” or “I have feelings.” It just seems like I’m always “wrong,” always “selfish,” always “self-centered” and everything else that’s negative and destructive.
BEATRICE SPARKS
It’s a good thing most people bleed on the inside or this would be a gory, blood-smeared earth.

BEATRICE SPARKS

It’s a good thing most people bleed on the inside or this would be a gory, blood-smeared earth.
BEATRICE SPARKS
How can thoughts hurt so much when they aren’t even physical?

BEATRICE SPARKS

How can thoughts hurt so much when they aren’t even physical?
BEATRICE SPARKS

Thought
I would like to stay stoned all the time, it scares me it’s so good. I would like to stay stoned every minute of every day for the rest of my life.

BEATRICE SPARKS

I would like to stay stoned all the time, it scares me it’s so good. I would like to stay stoned every minute of every day for the rest of my life.
BEATRICE SPARKS

Minutes Rest
Lying – remembering beauty in truth.
BEATRICE SPARKS
This morning when I left Mom’s parting words were, “Come straight home after school.” Wow! Like I’m going to get stoned at 3:30—it doesn’t sound so bad at that.

BEATRICE SPARKS

This morning when I left Mom’s parting words were, “Come straight home after school.” Wow! Like I’m going to get stoned at 3:30—it doesn’t sound so bad at that.
BEATRICE SPARKS

Mom
I’m not really sure which parts of myself are real and which parts are things I’ve gotten from books.

BEATRICE SPARKS

I’m not really sure which parts of myself are real and which parts are things I’ve gotten from books.
BEATRICE SPARKS

Part Real Really
Sometimes fantasies are better than life.

BEATRICE SPARKS

Sometimes fantasies are better than life.
BEATRICE SPARKS

Sometimes
I’m really cracking. No, I’m beyond cracking. I’m shattered. I’m lost. I’m fragmented.
BEATRICE SPARKS

Fragmented Shattered
Nobody’s talking to me, but nobody’s hassling me either. I guess you can’t have everything.

BEATRICE SPARKS

Nobody’s talking to me, but nobody’s hassling me either. I guess you can’t have everything.
BEATRICE SPARKS

Everything Nobody Talking
I pretend I’ve got lots of confidence and I’m a big jock and like that but deep inside I’m a frightened, insecure, can’t-make-it failure.

BEATRICE SPARKS

I pretend I’ve got lots of confidence and I’m a big jock and like that but deep inside I’m a frightened, insecure, can’t-make-it failure.
BEATRICE SPARKS

Frightened Insecure Jocks
The voice of every kid hooked on drugs, alcohol or the occult joins the sad chorus “Not me! I didn’t think it could ever happen to me. I was sure I could handle it.

BEATRICE SPARKS

The voice of every kid hooked on drugs, alcohol or the occult joins the sad chorus “Not me! I didn’t think it could ever happen to me. I was sure I could handle it.
BEATRICE SPARKS

Kids
I feel like Alice in Wonderland. Maybe Lewis G Carroll was on drugs too.

BEATRICE SPARKS

I feel like Alice in Wonderland. Maybe Lewis G Carroll was on drugs too.
BEATRICE SPARKS

Drug Feels Wonderland
I’m afraid to live and afraid to die.

BEATRICE SPARKS

I’m afraid to live and afraid to die.
BEATRICE SPARKS

Dies
They have accepted me as an individual, as a personality, as an entity. I belong! I am important! I am somebody!

BEATRICE SPARKS

They have accepted me as an individual, as a personality, as an entity. I belong! I am important! I am somebody!
BEATRICE SPARKS

Something
I really am only one infinitely small part of an aching humanity.

BEATRICE SPARKS

I really am only one infinitely small part of an aching humanity.
BEATRICE SPARKS

Small Parts

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