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Hubert Humphrey talks so fast that listening to him is like trying to read Playboy magazine with your wife turning the pages.

Barry Goldwater

A man from the west will fight over three things: water, women and gold, and usually in that order.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Fighting Men Order
I will offer a choice, not an echo.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Choices Echoes Inspiring
In your heart you know he’s right.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Funny Heart Humor
I do not undertake to promote welfare, for I propose to extend freedom. My aim is not to pass laws but to repeal them.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Aim Law Welfare
Small men, seeking great wealth or power, have too often and too long turned even the highest levels of public service into mere personal opportunity.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Long Men Opportunity
The fellow has absolutely no principles.”Money and gall” is all he has.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Fellows Presidential Principles
After one of his [Hubert Humphrey] long-winded harangues I suggested he had probably been vaccinated with a phonograph needle. He responded by saying that I would have been a great success in the movies working for Eighteenth Century-Fox.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Foxes Great Long Success
Most Americans have no real understanding of the operation of the international money lenders. The accounts of the Federal Reserve System have never been audited. It operates outside the control of Congress and manipulates the credit of the United States.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Freedom Money Real
You’ve got to forget about this civilian. Whenever you drop bombs, you’re going to hit civilians.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Bomb Civilian Peace War
Without the National Federation of Republican Women, there would be no Republican Party.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Federation Nation Party Republican
Unlimited campaign spending eats at the heart of the democratic process.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Campaigns Heart Politics
I made an effort to find out what was in the building at Wright Patterson Air Force Base where the information is stored that has been collected by the Air Force, and I was understandably denied this request. It is still classified above Top Secret.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Air Effort Secret
I’d rather see a woman elected…They understand they can’t spend more money than the old man brings home.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Home Men Sex
It is safe to say that the U.S. Congress is now run by paid staffers, not by people elected to do the job.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Jobs People Running
You don’t need to be straight to fight and die for your country. You just need to shoot straight.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Country Fighting Needs
I am a conservative Republican, but I believe in democracy and the separation of church and state. The conservative movement is founded on the simple tenet that people have the right to live life as they please as long as they don’t hurt anyone else in the process.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Hurt Inspirational Life
I thought of something my old coach at Staunton had often said: ‘We win some, we lose some, and some get rained out; but we always suit up.’
BARRY GOLDWATER

Said Suits Winning
To my mind the single essential element on which all discoveries will be dependent is human freedom.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Discovery Essentials Mind
Trade unions infringe upon the property rights of company owners.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Owner Rights Union
Where is the politician who has not promised to fight to the death for lower taxes- and who has not proceeded to vote for the very spending projects that make tax cuts impossible?
BARRY GOLDWATER

Cutting Fighting Government
We are on the Colorado — that means something more to me than electric power or a harnessed river.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Electrical Mean Power Rivers
I think some highly secret government UFO investigations are going on that we don’t know about–and probably never will unless the Air Force discloses them.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Air Government Thinking
Sex and politics are a lot alike. You don’t have to be good at them to enjoy them.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Enjoy Like You Sex
Everyone knows that gays have served honorably in the military since at least the time of Julius Caesar.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Gay Julius Military
When fraternities are not allowed, Communism flourishes. Young men who are inexperienced but have faith are more useful than older, experienced men without faith. The fraternity system is a bastion of American strength.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Men Unexperience Useful War
The best thing Clinton could do — I think I wrote him a letter about this, but I’m not sure — is to shut up. Every time I turn that radio on, there’s Clinton, making a speech. And he makes speeches on a subject he doesn’t know anything about. He has no discipline.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Discipline Letters Thinking
None of us here in Washington knows all or even half of the answers … If you love your country, don’t depend on handouts from Washington for your information. If you cherish your freedom, don’t leave it all up to big government.
BARRY GOLDWATER

Country Government Love

Hubert Humphrey talks so fast that listening to him is like trying to read Playboy magazine with your wife turning the pages.

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Hubert Humphrey talks so fast that listening to him is like trying to read Playboy magazine with your wife turning the pages.

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