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Exaggeration is the cheapest form of humor.

Barbara Mertz

But the dust! And the clutter! My housewifely and scholarly instincts were equally offended.
BARBARA MERTZ

Dust Instinct Scholarly
Is is difficult to be angry with a gentleman who pays you compliments, even impertinent compliments. Especially impertinent compliments.
BARBARA MERTZ

Gentleman Men Pay
Giving other people advice is one of the most irritating and useless activities known to man.
BARBARA MERTZ

Giving Men People
I would not be at all surprised to find that it was for gold that Cain committed the first murder. (It happened a very long time ago, and Holy Writ, though no doubt divinely inspired, is a trifle careless about details. God is not a historian).
BARBARA MERTZ

Doubt Gold Long Time
I’ve been reading ghost stories ever since I could read. I’m immensely curious about ghosts and UFOs and all that stuff, but I’m a very hard-headed person.
BARBARA MERTZ

Ghost Reading Stories Stuff
Children, I feel, are as much entitled to privacy as human beings.
BARBARA MERTZ

Children Feel Privacy
Many persons lead lives of crushing boredom.
BARBARA MERTZ

Boredom Crush Persons
When men start talking about ‘honor’, there is sure to be trouble ahead.
BARBARA MERTZ

Men Political Talking
A lady cannot be blamed if a master criminal takes a fancy to her.
BARBARA MERTZ

Criminals Fancy Masters
It is much more sensible to be an optimist instead of a pessimist, for if one is doomed to disappointment, why experience it in advance?
BARBARA MERTZ

Disappointment Optimist Pessimist
Spring is always cruel, with its false promise of resurrection.
BARBARA MERTZ

Promise Resurrection Spring
…Nefret said with a gusty sigh, ‘Well, that’s done it. We may as well join in, Ramses, family arguments are the favorite form of amusement here and this looks like being a loud one.
BARBARA MERTZ

Amusement Done Looks
Superstition has its practical uses.
BARBARA MERTZ

Practical Superstitions Use
I am so tired of ruggedly handsome heroes. I don’t know too many ruggedly handsome people who are necessarily nice people. In fact, the beautiful people have a big handicap because they rely too much on their appearance and don’t bother to become interesting.
BARBARA MERTZ

Beautiful Hero Nice
There was no warning, not even a knock. The door flew open, and he forgot his present aches and pains in anticipation of what lay in store. The figure that stood in the door was not that of an enemy. It was worse. It was his mother.
BARBARA MERTZ

Doors Mother Pain
It’s not unsporting to thrash a cowardly cad,’ said Simmons. ‘Everyone knows you don’t fight like a gentleman.’ ‘That might be called an oxymoron,’ Ramses said. ‘Oh–sorry. Bad form to use long words. Look it up when you get home.’ The poor devil didn’t know how to fight, like a gentleman or otherwise.
BARBARA MERTZ

Fighting Home Sorry

Exaggeration is the cheapest form of humor.

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Exaggeration is the cheapest form of humor.

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