“kissing someone out of pity is always a mistake.”

…Nefret said with a gusty sigh, ‘Well, that’s done it. We may as well join in, Ramses, family arguments are the favorite form of amusement here and this looks like being a loud one.

Ramses had always been fond of Helen, in his peculiar fashion, but if he had looked at me as he was looking at her, I would have sent for a constable.

Husbands do not care to be contradicted. Indeed, I do not know anyone who does.

I’ve been reading ghost stories ever since I could read. I’m immensely curious about ghosts and UFOs and all that stuff, but I’m a very hard-headed person.

When men start talking about ‘honor’, there is sure to be trouble ahead.

There was no warning, not even a knock. The door flew open, and he forgot his present aches and pains in anticipation of what lay in store. The figure that stood in the door was not that of an enemy. It was worse. It was his mother.

In the silence I heard Bastet, who had retreated under the bed, carrying on a mumbling, profane monologue. (If you ask how I knew it was profane, I presume you have never owned a cat.)

Cats always pick the laps of the people who don’t like them.

Giving other people advice is one of the most irritating and useless activities known to man.

His masculinity was only too apparent

I am so tired of ruggedly handsome heroes. I don’t know too many ruggedly handsome people who are necessarily nice people. In fact, the beautiful people have a big handicap because they rely too much on their appearance and don’t bother to become interesting.

Many persons lead lives of crushing boredom.

It may take us a little longer to reach the summit, but never fear, we will get there!

Another dead body. Every year it is the same. Every year, another dead body.

Since I am not as stupid as my children believe I am, I had immediately realized this might be a ruse, but I was not at all averse to a confrontation. In fact, I had been hoping for some such thing.

But the dust! And the clutter! My housewifely and scholarly instincts were equally offended.

Happiness is like a kiss. You must share it to enjoy it.

A kiss from my mother made me a painter.

You can no more keep a martini in the refrigerator than you can keep a kiss there. The proper union of gin and vermouth is a great and sudden glory; it is one of the happiest marriages on earth and one of the shortest-lived.

All on-set kisses are weird, no matter who it is, especially with people standing around coughing and sneezing. It’s very uncomfortable!

I had to kiss it [ playing Hamlet] goodbye because Marvel have to plot things for the next three, four years.

Perhaps thou gav’st me, though unseen, a kiss; Perhaps a tear, if souls can weep in bliss.

I made jokes about kissing Murphy Brown. But if that’s what cost me my job, my wife will probably say, “Hey asshole, I told you so”.

With a kiss you can strip me defenseless.