“The ideal husband understands every word his wife doesn’t say.”

There is something more important than logic: imagination.

I am a typed director. If I made Cinderella, the audience would immediately be looking for a body in the coach.

I like stories with lots of psychology.

A lot of movies are about life, mine are like a slice of cake.

Television is like the invention of indoor plumbing. It didn’t change people’s habits. It just kept them inside the house.

Give them pleasure – the same pleasure they have when they wake up from a nightmare.

Never judge a country by its politicians.

I always take the audience into account.

You think she’s pretty, you ought to see my slingshot!

Always make the audience suffer as much as possible.

The Birds could be the most terrifying motion picture I have ever made.

There is no terror in the bang, only in the anticipation of it.

This award is meaningful because it comes from my fellow dealers in celluloid.

One never knows the ending. One has to die to know exactly what happens after death, although Catholics have their hopes.

The more successful the villain, the more successful the picture.

Suspense is like a woman. The more left to the imagination, the more the excitement.

Only person I’m scared of fighting is Paris Hilton.

You know it’s funny when it rains it pours They got money for wars, but can’t feed the poor.

There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.

The problem with this country is that you meet your soulmate after getting married.

If more government is the answer, then it was a really stupid question.

I m having kids so that one can be a billionaire and imma steal all there shit.

Help! Mom! There Are Liberals Under My Bed’ is the title of the book.

Why is it when you’re dieting, you crave everything?