We have been taught to wish for it, but the wish to be understood may be our most vengeful demand, may be the way we hang on, as adults ,
ADAM PHILLIPSWanting to be understood, as adults, can be our most violent form of nostalgia.
More Adam Phillips Quotes
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Monogamy is a way of getting the versions of ourselves down to the minimum.
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Transgression is a quest for solitude
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Sanity, as the project of keeping ourselves recognizably human, therefore has to limit the range of human experience.
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I am always true to myself, that is the problem. Who else could I be true to?
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Lovers, of course, are notoriously frantic epistemologists, second only to paranoiacs (and analysts) as readers of signs and wonders.
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Believing in religion is like believing that adulthood is the solution to childhood.
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It is as if to say: if these are not valued – if these forms of wanting and feeling and speaking and doing – are not cultivated and encouraged and rewarded in the child, then the child will be mad.
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People change, but there really are limits.
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The past influences everything and dictates nothing.
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The child..will try to make himself..independent of other people. .
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You write to find out what you believe.
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To grow up is to discover what one is unequal to.
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we are continually under threat from what we are unwilling and/or unable to see.
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Excesses of appetite are self-cures for feelings of hopelessness. ..
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The vocabulary of one’s self-criticism is so impoverished and clichéd.
ADAM PHILLIPS