“I was born in India – but never really lived there.”

England has an interesting relationship with the Indian subcontinent because the years of colonization and the history between the two places.

From my parent’s generation the idea was not that marriage was about some kind of idealized, romantic love. It was a partnership. It’s about creating family. It’s about creating offspring.

When I was 11 my friend’s mom made a peanut butter sandwich. I ate the sandwich and was like, ‘I’m never eating anything else again.’ And I still eat peanut butter every day. I would put peanut butter on a steak.

When my family decided to leave England I could not have been happier. I was sort of like – America seemed like the land of opportunity and, you know, it was Hollywood to me.

We are Muslims. My father would pawn off his Muslim in-laws as Hindus just so that he could get free pancakes.

Statistically there is enough voter fraud to sway zero elections.

I grew up on American pop culture so everything that I fantasized about to get out of this sort of humdrum world of Bradford was about America. So when we decided to move there I was on the plane.

I’ve always said I’m the worst representative of Muslim-Americans that’s ever existed, because I’ve been inside more bars than mosques.

It’s an organic thing that I try not to analyze too much, because I worry that it will go away.

I think politicians and comedians have a lot in common. One is a group of approval-seeking narcissists who will say and do anything to be liked… and comedians are always talking about politics.

So I had this completely unrealistic idea of what America was — but I wanted to be there.

I’m Muslim the way many of my Jewish friends are Jewish: I avoid pork, and I take the big holidays off.

It is ironic that it doesn’t matter how successful I am in any other capacity. Ultimately, my parents marker is do you have a wife? And do you have children?

North Carolina precinct chairman and GOP executive committee member Don Yelton thinks his state’s new voting restrictions are just fine.

If you don’t acknowledge differences, it’s as bad as stereotyping or reducing someone.

An artist’s job is simply to take the mirror in front of your face and hold it there. It’s not to give you any answers. It is simply to take that mirror and point it at you.

More and more do I see that only a successful revolution in India can break England’s back forever and free Europe itself.

It is not a national question concerning India any longer; it is purely international.

Jihadis have a better bureaucracy than India.

I now know what Sachin Tendulkar feels every time he bats in India.

I am a follower of Mahatma Gandhi.

India will have to hang down her head in shame if even one person is left who is said in any way to be untouchable.

From my experience of having served for 3000 days, I can say that anything can be achieved.

There can be no better place than India to manufacture, expand, and grow.