“I’ve been married forty-five years. I think laughter is the secret.”

A guy walks into a psychologist’s convention with a banana in his pocket.When asked about the significance of this he says;well,they were all out of grapes.

You shouldn’t get too close to the truth, because then maybe you stop being funny.

Funny is funny is funny.

I think you should be a child for as long as you can. I have been successful for 74 years being able to do that.

People with a sense of humor tend to be less egocentric and more realistic in their view of the world and more humble in moments of success and less defeated in times of travail.

All I can say about life is “Oh God, enjoy it.

There are a lot of questions I keep asking myself about why I do comedy. I guess I laugh to keep from crying. And I guess if you ever get me crying, I might not stop. This is the way I look at tragedy or else I’ll cry.

Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on.

A lot of money is spent trying to keep people alive who don’t necessarily want to be alive.

I am a minimalist. I like saying the most with the least.

I have to laugh when I receive newsletters from major personalities and when you hit reply, you get a ‘do-not-reply’ address. It’s ridiculous! Don’t you want your customers to reply to you?

It’s no accident many accuse me of conducting public affairs with my heart instead of my head. Well, what if I do?.. Those who don’t know how to weep with their whole heart don’t know how to laugh either.

A good laugh overcomes more difficulties and dissipates more dark clouds than any other one thing.

Once I was a prisoner lost inside myself with the world surrounding me, wandering through the misery, but now I am free. Free to love, free to laugh, free to soar, free to shine, free to give.

It’s what I always wanted to do, to show the laughter, the fun, the joy of dance.

My philosophy is, it’s always very rewarding when you can make an audience laugh. I don’t mind making fun of myself. I like self-deprecating comedy. But I’d like you to laugh with me occasionally, too.

It only hurts when I’m not laughing.

Pain is never too weak to leave the body still standing or laughing the same.