black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

I get facials. I get a manicure and pedicure every week. I get my hair cut, and I oil myself down from head to toe. I got that from my brother. I was so impressed with how high maintenance he was. When he left the room, you could still smell him for an hour.

Bernie Mac

When I get a chance to play golf or go on a boat with good people, take the boat out and put some lobsters on the grill, get the ice-cold beer and the cigars – that’s heaven here on earth.
BERNIE MAC

Beer Boat Golf Ice Lobster
Making people laugh is what I’ve been doing since I was like four or five years old. I still have a lust, I still have a passion. I don’t care about how I look, I’m dedicated to the laughs.
BERNIE MAC

Laughing Life Live Making Passion Years
I learned hard lessons in life; I had to because I had so much happen: My mother died my sophomore year in high school. The next year, same day, my brother dropped dead. Two years after that, I got married because my girlfriend got pregnant. The year after my wedding, my father – who I had only recently met – died.
BERNIE MAC

Brother Girlfriend Happen Mother School
If you mess something up, remember who got you there. Don’t be pointing fingers, even if finger-pointing is called for. Only one you got to blame is your own self.
BERNIE MAC

Blame Remember Self
I don’t need to pat myself on the back until my arm breaks. I don’t need any of that.
BERNIE MAC

Arms Break Needs
I had to do clubs where street gangs were, had to do motorcycle gangs, gay balls and things of that nature.
BERNIE MAC

Gangs Motorcycycle Nature Things
Okay, first rule of this carpool. No breaking wind in my car. The only gas that Bernie Mac want to be smelling is unleaded.
BERNIE MAC

Car Unreal Want Wind
You know, every time it comes, every time that light comes on or every time that camera comes on, every time that microphone comes on, the Mac Man seek and destroy.
BERNIE MAC

Cameras Comes Light Men Microphone
Why I was so intrigued with Red Skelton was because he was able to make you cry and laugh and the same time. That was power.
BERNIE MAC

Able Laughing Red Same Time
My girlfriend Rhonda, who’s now my wife, I graduated from high school, she got pregnant. My grandfather said, ‘You’ve got to do the right thing.’
BERNIE MAC

Girlfriend Right School Things Wife
I think a lot of TV insults the audience.
BERNIE MAC

Insult Television Thinking
Jerry Weintraub, the producer, might be a pain in the ass, but he really knows how to treat his actors.
BERNIE MAC

Actors might Pain Producer
Black audiences are hard. They always think they’re better than you. So you got to come with a little extra to satisfy them.
BERNIE MAC

Black Littles Satisfy Thinking
I wasn’t disciplined at all. As good of an athlete as I was, I was not disciplined. Had I had the drive that I have in comedy, and acting, and writing, that’s why I knew it just wasn’t right for me.
BERNIE MAC

Acting Athlete Comedy Writing
Suffering is a good teacher. It keeps you in its grip until you’ve learned your lesson.
BERNIE MAC

Lesson Suffering Teacher
My comedy comes from pain. I can’t stand to see someone hurting.
BERNIE MAC

Comedy Hurt Pain Someone

I get facials. I get a manicure and pedicure every week. I get my hair cut, and I oil myself down from head to toe. I got that from my brother. I was so impressed with how high maintenance he was. When he left the room, you could still smell him for an hour.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

I get facials. I get a manicure and pedicure every week. I get my hair cut, and I oil myself down from head to toe. I got that from my brother. I was so impressed with how high maintenance he was. When he left the room, you could still smell him for an hour.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bernie Mac Quotes