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France is the only place where you can make love in the afternoon without people hammering on your door.

Barbara Cartland

After forty a woman has to choose between losing her figure or her face. My advice is to keep your face, and stay sitting down.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Birthday Funny Women
As long as the plots keep arriving from outer space, I’ll go on with my virgins.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Arriving Long Space
Love is next to Godliness with certain safeguards.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Certain Love Next
The right diet directs sexual energy into the parts that matter.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Energy Food Matter
France is the only place where you can make love in the afternoon without people hammering on your door.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Doors Love People
A historical romance is the only kind of book where chastity really counts.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Book Historical Romance
My heroines are always virgins. They never go to bed without a ring on their fingers; not until page 118 at least.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Bed Fingers Pages
Good must triumph over evil. It usually does in life and in any case it’s bad for young people to believe it doesn’t.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Believe Evil People
You become what you think. You are what you eat.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Become Eat Food Thinking
The great majority of people in England and America are modest, decent and pure-minded and the amount of virgins in the world today is stupendous.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Country Majority People Person Virgin
I consider myself an expert on love, sex and health. Without health you can have very little of the other two.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Experts Sex Two
People don’t roll around naked in my books. I do allow them to go to bed if they’re married, but it’s all very wonderful and the moon beams.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Book Moon People
A man will teach his wife what is needed to arouse his desires. And there is no reason for a woman to know any more than what her husband is prepared to teach her. If she gets married knowing far too much about what she wants and doesn’t want then she will be ready to find fault with her husband.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Husband Marriage Women
I’ll keep going till my face falls off.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Faces Fall Going Keep
A woman should say: ‘Have I made him happy? Is he satisfied? Does he love me more than he loved me before? Is he likely to go to bed with another woman?’ If he does, then it’s the wife’s fault because she is not trying to make him happy.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Love Wife Women
The reason why Englishmen are the best husbands in the world is because they want to be faithful. A Frenchman or an Italian will wake up in the morning and wonder what girl he will meet. An Englishman wakes up and wonders what the cricket score is.
BARBARA CARTLAND

Girl Husband Morning

France is the only place where you can make love in the afternoon without people hammering on your door.

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France is the only place where you can make love in the afternoon without people hammering on your door.

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