“Career highlights? I had two – I got an intentional walk from Sandy Koufax and I got out of a rundown against the Mets.”

I did stand-up, weird and ignorant stuff about my career – anything for a laugh.

Anybody with ability can play in the big leagues. But to be able to trick people year in and year out the way I did, I think that was a much greater feat.

How do you catch a knuckleball? You wait until it stops rolling, then go pick it up.

We were on for six years. We were in syndication for a while. It had its run. I still see the people from ‘Mr. Belvedere,’ too. We stay in touch.

When I looked at the third base coach, he turned his back on me.

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to?

I didn’t get a lot of awards as a player. But they did have a Bob Uecker Day Off for me once in Philly.

Baseball hasn’t forgotten me. I go to a lot of old-timers games and I haven’t lost a thing. I sit in the bullpen and let people throw things at me. Just like old times.

I signed a very modest $3,000 bonus with the Braves in Milwaukee. And my old man didn’t have that kinda money to put out.

I hope the fans have enjoyed listening as much as I’ve enjoyed doing the games. I don’t ever go to the park where I don’t have a good day.

After getting out of the service and going into baseball I never wanted to do anything else.

You throw batting practice, you warm up pitchers, you sit and cheer. You do whatever you have to do to stay on the team.

I had slumps that lasted into the winter.

Sporting goods companies pay me not to endorse their products.

Hey, I think it’s easy for guys to hit .300 and stay in the big leagues. Hit .200 and try to stick around as long as I did; I think it’s a much greater accomplishment. That’s hard.

I think I set a terrific example of ‘Don’t do this’ and ‘Don’t do that.’ And that’s one of the things that I’m most proud of.

Africa is a paradox which illustrates and highlights neo-colonialism .

My friends are a crayola box. They highlight different colors of my being, representing different aspects of my personalty, I’ve noticed.

Op-eds and studies can highlight our decreased enthusiasm for Facebook ’til the cows come home.

We want to get to a point where Twitter highlights lead to purchase of a live game

Your act of kindness towards someone could be the highlight of their day.