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Dark forces dragged me away from the keyboard, swirling forces of irresistible intensity and power.

Boris Johnson

He thinks of himself as a gigantic keystone in the arch, with all the lesser stones logically induced to support his position. He has a kind of semi-ideology to go with it – a leftish Toryism: imperialist, romantic, but on the side of the working man.
BORIS JOHNSON

Ideology Lesser Logically Position
It is just flipping unbelievable. He is a mixture of Harry Houdini and a greased piglet. He is barely human in his elusiveness. Nailing Blair is like trying to pin jelly to a wall.
BORIS JOHNSON

Appearance Believe Flip Human Wall
Some people think that it [Brexit] is the end of the world. It’s not. On the contrary, it’s a massive opportunity for this country.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Himself Massive Opportunity People Thinking
Try as I might, I could not look at an overhead projection of a growth profit matrix and stay conscious.
BORIS JOHNSON

Growth Looks Trying
When Cameron’s Conservatives come to power it will be a golden age for cyclists and an Elysium of cycle lanes, bike racks, and sharia law for bike thieves. And I hope that cycling in London will become almost Chinese in its ubiquity.
BORIS JOHNSON

Cycling Law Ubiquity
The mayors fund for London will be a streamlined vehicle for getting money from the wealth creating sector to communities across London that are facing hardship and deprivation and are the victims of crime.
BORIS JOHNSON

Community Creating Hardship
Never in my life did I think I would be congratulated by Mick Jagger for achieving anything.
BORIS JOHNSON

Achieve Congratulations Thinking
I think I was once given cocaine but I sneezed so it didn’t go up my nose. In fact, it may have been icing sugar.
BORIS JOHNSON

Facts Icing Thinking
My ideal world is, we’re there, we’re in the EU, trying to make it better.
BORIS JOHNSON

Better Ideas Trying World
Voting Tory will cause your wife to have bigger breasts and increase your chances of owning a BMW M3.
BORIS JOHNSON

Chance Reason Vote Wife Yourself
Nothing excites compassion, in friend and foe alike, as much as the sight of you ker-splonked on the Tarmac with your propeller buried six feet under.
BORIS JOHNSON

Compassion Feet Sight
Since January 1993 there have been 27 other countries not in the EU that have done better than the UK at exporting goods into the single market.
BORIS JOHNSON

Country Done January
Do you seriously propose that they are going to be so insane as to allow tariffs to be imposed. The EU is, I’m afraid a job destroying engine. You can see it all across southern Europe, you can see it, alas, in our country.
BORIS JOHNSON

Allow Country Ourselves Propose Serious
He is like some sherry-crazed old dowager who has lost the family silver at roulette, and who now decides to double up by betting the house as well.
BORIS JOHNSON

Business Debt House
It is easy to make promises – it is hard work to keep them.
BORIS JOHNSON

Easy Hard Work Promise
My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it.
BORIS JOHNSON

Birthday Cake Dessert

Dark forces dragged me away from the keyboard, swirling forces of irresistible intensity and power.

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Dark forces dragged me away from the keyboard, swirling forces of irresistible intensity and power.

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