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My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.

Boris Johnson

I dont see why people are so snooty about Channel Five. It has some respectable documentaries about the Second World War. It also devotes considerable airtime to investigations into lap-dancing, and other related and vital subjects
BORIS JOHNSON

Dancing People War
My speaking style was criticised by no less an authority than Arnold Schwarzenegger. It was a low moment, my friends, to have my rhetorical skills denounced by a monosyllabic Austrian cyborg.
BORIS JOHNSON

Criticism Low Moments Skills Style Talk
We need to look at our nannying, mollycoddled, politically correct culture in my view, which stops kids from going out and playing competitive sport. I also think we need to look at the shear fatness of the regulations which control people who want to help kids play sport.
BORIS JOHNSON

Football Soccer Sports
What makes the achievements of communist Russia so special and different, that you can simper around in a CCCP T-shirt, while anyone demented enough to wear anything commemorating the Third Reich would be speedily banged away under the 1986 Public Order Act?
BORIS JOHNSON

Achievement Commemorating Country Demented Wear
I have not been more robust towards female rather than male assembly members and I do not believe I have been remotely sexist.
BORIS JOHNSON

Believe Female Myself Remote
It is easy to make promises – it is hard work to keep them.
BORIS JOHNSON

Easy Hard Promise Work
Nothing excites compassion, in friend and foe alike, as much as the sight of you ker-splonked on the Tarmac with your propeller buried six feet under.
BORIS JOHNSON

Compassion Excitement Sight
All the people I talk to, increasingly, can see that the emperor has got no clothes. The case for leaving [the EU] is now overwhelming.
BORIS JOHNSON

Clothes Leaving People
This is our chance to build a Britain where everyone benefits from the success of the economy.
BORIS JOHNSON

Benefits Chance Economy
We celebrate the contribution of people who have come to this country to make it better.
BORIS JOHNSON

Celebrate Country People
He is the resounding human rebuttal to all Marxist historians who think history is the story of vast and impersonal economic forces. The point of the Churchill Factor is that one man can make all the difference.
BORIS JOHNSON

Difference History Human Man Oneself Thinking Vast
It is said that the Queen has come to love the Commonwealth, partly because it supplies her with regular cheering crowds of flag-waving picaninnies; and one can imagine that Blair, twice victor abroad but enmired at home, is similarly seduced by foreign politeness.
BORIS JOHNSON

Cheer Fall Queens
He is like some sherry-crazed old dowager who has lost the family silver at roulette, and who now decides to double up by betting the house as well.
BORIS JOHNSON

Decision Double Family Himself Lost
I love tennis with a passion. I challenged Boris Becker to a match once and he said he was up for it but he never called back. I bet I could make him run around.
BORIS JOHNSON

Him Love Myself Passion Run
I’m no communist. I’m a tax cutting Conservative. But I want a capitalism that is fairer to forgotten people.
BORIS JOHNSON

Communism Conservatism Forget People Tax
The mayors fund for London will be a streamlined vehicle for getting money from the wealth creating sector to communities across London that are facing hardship and deprivation and are the victims of crime.
BORIS JOHNSON

Community Creating Hardship

My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.

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My chances of being PM are about as good as the chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.

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