black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

Hour 36 of labor. I pull at god’s necktie dig a hole at the hospital floor.

Chelsie Diane

This morning I tell the kindest man on earth after two dates, you are good and you are not my man. My man is not as good as you.
CHELSIE DIANE

Earth Goodness Kindness Man Morning Yourself
My entire life I’ve waited for a man to teach the world how to treat me and if he’d step in and convince them all.
CHELSIE DIANE

Convince Life Man Myself Teaching Wait World
God is a woman and like every woman has millions of years of men speaking for her.
CHELSIE DIANE

God Herself Talk Woman
I found my old diary tonight. A brokenness I had forgotten pen pressured so deep it punctured page. I ran my fingers over my words and there inside ridges black I found a little girl desperate for someone to save her, desperate for the very woman I have become.
CHELSIE DIANE

Black Book Broken Deep Desperate Forget Myself Night Woman
I will not believe It’s less holy to be human. I will not bow my head. I will not close my eyes to god.
CHELSIE DIANE

Believe Eyes God Head Holy Human Myself
You say: you are mourning a man that could not love you. Full stop. Cover the last word. There’s the truth.
CHELSIE DIANE

Deep Love Man Mourn Relationship Truth Yourself
You loved me gray sweatpants and I loved you drunk on stouts and I am velveeta mac and cheese.
CHELSIE DIANE

Appearance Drink Love Myself
Oh the salt water I had to sweat to realize there was an ocean inside of me.
CHELSIE DIANE

Myself Ocean Realization Water
The uncharted territory of the western amazon is called the mother of god.
CHELSIE DIANE

Amazon God Mom Myself
I play with the nativity and tell mary she looks good in that color blue.
CHELSIE DIANE

Blue Goodness Marriage Myself Native Pay
You’re rolling me in coffee hands I’m u-turn smoked rubber coming back- oh I’m spent, ask on the still.
CHELSIE DIANE

Coffee Hands Time Yourself
I call you to say we have no other choice but to date for a year go our separate ways and cheat on whoever we marry forever.
CHELSIE DIANE

Call Cheating Choice Date Forever Marriage
A twenty three year old hits on me in a coffee shop in venice, and I ask him if father is single.
CHELSIE DIANE

Coffee Father Myself Old Shop
Don’t get too used to being alone.
CHELSIE DIANE

Alone Company Lonely
If your mother does not love you well or is no longer here to love you well, may you feel worthy enough to open to the thousand tiny ways the spirit of mother longs to love you today.
CHELSIE DIANE

Enough Love Mom Small Way Worth Yourself
I meet you and know suddenly and horribly there is no difference between sex and war that I must die to get that close to touching god.
CHELSIE DIANE

Death God Horrible Sex Touch War

Hour 36 of labor. I pull at god’s necktie dig a hole at the hospital floor.

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Hour 36 of labor. I pull at god’s necktie dig a hole at the hospital floor.

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