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A movie in production is the greatest train set a boy could ever have.

Orson Welles

They teach anything in universities today. You can major in mud pies.
ORSON WELLES

Education Funny Teaching University Wasted Time Yourself
I don’t pray really, because I don’t want to bore God.
ORSON WELLES

Boredom God Prayer
Now I’m an old Christmas tree, the roots of which have died. They just come along and while the little needles fall off me replace them with medallions.
ORSON WELLES

Death Myself Replacement Time Tree
I don’t say we all ought to misbehave, but we ought to look as if we could.
ORSON WELLES

Appearance Attitude Audacity Behavior
Race hate isn’t human nature; race hate is the abandonment of human nature.
ORSON WELLES

Abandonment Deep Hate Human Nature Race Wisdom
In my opinion, there are two things that can absolutely not be carried to the screen: the realistic presentation of the sexual act and praying to God.
ORSON WELLES

Act Carry God Opinion Pray Sex
A director is someone who presides over a series of accidents.
ORSON WELLES

Accident Director Job Series
I’m one of those fellows so frightened of driving that I go 80 miles an hour – and the more frightened I get, the faster I go.
ORSON WELLES

Drive Fast Myself Scare
A film is never really good unless the camera is an eye in the head of a poet.
ORSON WELLES

Camera Eyes Goodness Movie Poet
Criminals are never very amusing. It’s because they’re failures. Those who make real money aren’t counted as criminals. This is a class distinction, not an ethical problem.
ORSON WELLES

Amazing Crime Failure Money Problem Reality
My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people.
ORSON WELLES

Doctor Food Funny Myself People Stop
I’m not basically a happy person, but I have all kinds of joy.
ORSON WELLES

Happiness Joy Kind Myself Person
I’m never certain of a performance – my own or the other actors’ – or the script or anything. But to me it seems there’s only one place in the world the camera can be, and the decision usually comes immediately.
ORSON WELLES

Actor Camera Decision Myself Performance Place Script World
I hate women, hate them generally, not in particular but in an abstract way. I hate them because one never really learns anything about them. They are inscrutable.
ORSON WELLES

Hate Learning Myself Woman
Hollywood is a gold-plated suburb suitable for golfers, gardeners, assorted middlemen, and contented movies stars. I am none of these things.
ORSON WELLES

Gardener Gold Hollywood Movie Myself Stardom
My kind of director is an actor-director who writes.
ORSON WELLES

Director Kind Myself Writing

A movie in production is the greatest train set a boy could ever have.

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A movie in production is the greatest train set a boy could ever have.

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