“The heyday of woman’s life is the shady side of fifty.”

In her present ignorance, woman’s religion, instead of making her noble and free, by the wrong application of great principles ofright and justice, has made her bondage but more certain and lasting, her degradation more hopeless and complete.

The memory of my own suffering has prevented me from ever shadowing one young soul with the superstition of the Christian religion.

Religious superstitions more than all other influences put together cripple & enslave woman, but so long as women themselves do not see it & hug their chains, we have a great educational work to do.

Womanhood is the great fact in her life; wifehood and motherhood are but incidental relations.

The new religion will teach the dignity of human nature and its infinite possibilities for development. It will teach the solidarity of the race: that all must rise and fall as one. Its creed will be justice, liberty, equality for all the children of earth.

The bible teaches that women brought sin and death into the world. I don’t believe that any man ever talked with god. The bible was written by man out of his love of domination.

Nature, like a loving mother, is ever trying to keep land and sea, mountain and valley, each in its place, to hush the angry winds and waves, balance the extremes of heat and cold, of rain and drought, that peace, harmony and beauty may reign supreme.

The more complete the despotism, the more smoothly all things move on the surface.

Among the clergy we find our most violent enemies, those most opposed to any change in woman’s position.

The Bible and the Church have been the greatest stumbling blocks in the way of women’s emancipation.

My religious superstition gave place to rational ideas based on scientific facts, and in proportion as I looked at everything from a new standpoint, I grew more happy day by day.

The prolonged slavery of woman is the darkest page in human history.

Words cannot describe the indignation a proud woman feels for her sex in disfranchisement.

[On women’s role in the home:] Every wife, mother and housekeeper feels at present that there is some screw loose in the household situation.

To develop our real selves, we need time alone for thought and meditation. To be always giving out and never pumping in, the well runs dry.

Men think that self-sacrifice is the most charming of all the cardinal virtues for women, and in order to keep it in healthy working order, they make opportunities for its illustration as often as possible.

A great destiny needs a generous diet. What can be expected of a people that live on macaroni!

Vegetarians are people who cannot hear tomatos screaming.

I grew up in a house that liked to be funny. Everybody liked to be funny. My family’s been…we’ve been enjoying each other’s comedy for years.

Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.

The only stupid thing about words is the spelling of them.

My fans are so funny, they make me laugh so much. I’ve got some really, really, funny, clever fans.

I actually get a lot of messages with people saying, ‘What’s a Marvin Gaye?’ and, I mean… Oh, wow. I must be getting old, because someone who was born in 2004 just asked me what a Marvin Gaye was.

Lord Help the Mister that comes between Me and My Sister.