“It’s the kind of game that makes you go home and beat your wife.”

I was asked for years about being a Republican, probably because most black people are Democrats. My mother heard it once and called me and said ‘Charles, Republicans are for the rich people.’ And I said, ‘Mom, I’m rich.’

I know I’m never as good or bad as one single performance. I’ve never believed in my critics or my worshippers, and I’ve always been able to leave the game at the arena.

I just thank God for Dennis [Rodman], cause he makes me look like a saint.

Kids are great. That’s one of the best things about our business, all the kids you get to meet. It’s a shame they have to grow up to be regular people and come to the games and call you names.

If Michael Jordan was a damn plumber, he couldn’t get a date. Any guy got $500 million looks good.

I think anybody who is racist is an idiot whether they are black or white.

When you’re black, you have to deal with so much crap in your life from other black people. It’s a dirty, dark secret; I’m glad it’s coming out.

When you read the book you see that these guys aren’t holding any punches. They’re straightforward. They’re honest. They’re giving you their honest opinion.

I have nothing against old people; I want to be one myself one day.

I don’t worry about playing basketball; that comes natural. I just want to have fun.

You can talk without saying a thing. I don’t ever want to be that type of person.

Poor people have been voting for Democrats for the last 50 years and they’re still poor.

Listening to a woman is almost as bad as losing to one. There are only three things that women are better at than men: cleaning, cooking, and having sex.

We’re not all supposed to think alike.

I know a lot of people did a lot of heavy lifting to make me successful and I do everything in my power not to screw it up.

I want to be a politician. I think I understand how the system works, I think a lot of politicians are corrupt, and it’s about time we put some people in there who are going to look out for the majority of the people instead of the rich people.

Money is not everything but it ranks right up there with oxygen.

The funniest people are the saddest ones.

I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

I only drink Champagne on two occasions, when I am in love and when I am not.

I think that I’m so psychotic and so mentally ill that if I could tap into that I could do something really interesting.

Whenever someone refers to me as someone “who happens to be black,” I wonder if they realize that both my parents are black. If I had turned out to be Scandinavian or Chinese, people would have wondered what was going on.

Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they’ve got nothing to lose.

Going through a rough break-up? Nothing a little dance party with friends can’t ease.