Oh sure, I have a few black people in my family tree. They’re probably still hanging there.
ZACH BRAFFWhen you’re the director and the writer, you never have to remember your lines, and there’s no one to call you on it. On Garden State I did different lines on every take, just making crap up. And it was great each time.
More Zach Braff Quotes
-
-
It blows my mind that there are people out there who deny the holocaust. Why would you ever deny such a great achievement. It’s like denying the cure for polio or something.
ZACH BRAFF -
Yea, he’s alright…but he’s no Zach Braff.
ZACH BRAFF -
If a benevolent God exists, so does reincarnation. He wouldn’t send me here just once.
ZACH BRAFF -
I don’t think restaurants should refuse to serve minority people. They are quite tasty when prepared correctly.
ZACH BRAFF -
Don’t get me started on cold toilet seats.
ZACH BRAFF -
Sometimes Sarah [Chalke] starts to talk about Iraq or whatever and she gets all excited, like I actually give a crap what she’s saying. Come on, she’s a woman. But still, it’s very cute.
ZACH BRAFF -
I have a great relationship with my parents. I have not been on lithium.
ZACH BRAFF -
Sure the jews killed jesus, but the guy was an awful carpenter
ZACH BRAFF -
It’s hard for me not to be extraordinarily cute. I had to fight it.
ZACH BRAFF -
Retarded kids are the best. When they ask for an autograph I just fake sign a picture and tell them that it’s in invisible ink and it will show up later. They totally buy it. It saves me a fortune in markers.
ZACH BRAFF -
You always see black people complaining about this and that, but you never see me complaining about how slow they work on my plantation.
ZACH BRAFF -
My job as an actor has inspired generations of children to become doctors. My job as a writer has opened up the minds of millions. My job as a director has produced masterpieces that will be taught in film school for ages.
ZACH BRAFF -
If I had a billion dollars I would…oh wait…already do.
ZACH BRAFF -
It’s always weird being the only white person in a group. It feels like everyone’s looking to me for guidance.
ZACH BRAFF -
So for front-runners we have a black and a woman. It’s like being made to choose between syphilis or having and old man crap on your face. I would do the country a favor and run myself but I couldn’t deprive Hollywood of me for 4 years.
ZACH BRAFF