I once fisted two babies and then used the corpses as boxing gloves to fight off the grieving parents.
ZACH BRAFFIt turns out Superman is weak to Kryptonite and horses.
More Zach Braff Quotes
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The thing about hitting kids is, think about if you were doing the same thing to another adult. Hitting your kid is really the same as hitting your employee or wife, and the issue become pretty clear when you think about it that way.
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Women are like parking spots, the best ones are handicapped.
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It’s hard for me not to be extraordinarily cute. I had to fight it.
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When I was told they wanted the show to be about doctors, I was a bit reluctant to sign on, you know? I thought, why have a show about doctors when we could have a show about the real heroes, you know, like me?
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My co-stars aren’t bad actors, but they’re no Zach Braff.
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I can’t watch the news anymore. They have their priorities all out of whack. All I see is Natalee Holloway and Britney Spears and the war in Iraq. Where’s the substantive news? Where’s the Zach Braff coverage?
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Now, I’m not going to be misquoted on this like I have numerous times before, so I’ll be quite clear. I’ve never said hitler was my hero, just that if he had focused on more than one race he would have had the right idea. Try to turn that one against me.
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Sometimes Sarah [Chalke] starts to talk about Iraq or whatever and she gets all excited, like I actually give a crap what she’s saying. Come on, she’s a woman. But still, it’s very cute.
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Don’t get me started on cold toilet seats.
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It turns out Superman is weak to Kryptonite and horses.
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Sure the jews killed jesus, but the guy was an awful carpenter
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It’s always weird being the only white person in a group. It feels like everyone’s looking to me for guidance.
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If a benevolent God exists, so does reincarnation. He wouldn’t send me here just once.
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The success of ‘Scrubs’ allowed me to pursue anything I felt passionately about without having to worry about money. It allowed me to spend my summer work shopping my show at a nonprofit theater.
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People ask me, ‘Did the fame come too fast? Do you ever wish for your old life?’ I always tell them that there’s nothing on earth better than being famous.
ZACH BRAFF