“It’s a scientific fact that if you stay in California you lose one point of your IQ every year.”

Friendship is a pretty full-time occupation if you really are friendly with somebody. You can’t have too many friends because then you’re just not really friends.

Past certain ages or certain wisdoms it is very difficult to look with wonder; it is best done when one is a child; after that, and if you are lucky, you will find a bridge of childhood and walk across it.

It’s better to look at the sky than live there.

To me, the greatest pleasure of writing is not what it’s about, but the inner music that words make.

How do I look so young? Quite simple: a complete vegetable diet, 12 hours sleep a night, and lots and lots of make-up.

Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.

The enemy was anyone who was someone he wanted to be or who had anything he wanted to have.

Good luck and believe me, dearest Doc – it’s better to look at the sky than live there. Such an empty place; so vague. Just a country where the thunder goes and things disappear.

The brain may take advice, but not the heart, and love, having no geography, knows no boundaries: weight and sink it deep, no matter, it will rise and find the surface.

I thought of the future, and spoke of the past.

We all, sometimes, leave each other there under the skies, and we never understand why.

Finishing a book is just like you took a child out in the back yard and shot it.

The most dangerous thing in the world is to make a friend of an Englishman, because he’ll come sleep in your closet rather than spend 10 shillings on a hotel.

A man who doesn’t dream is like a man who doesn’t sweat. He stores up a lot of poison.

I don’t care what anybody says about me as long as it isn’t true.

If there is no mystery, for the artist, to solve inside of his art, then there’s no point in it….for me, every act of the art of solving a mystery.

Why, in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?

First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.

Australia, Australia, we love you from the heart. The kidneys, the liver & the giblets too. And every other part.

I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one.

I have definitely had guys walk up to me, put their arm around me, and when they walk away, my shoulder smells like taco meat.

I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. So I said, “Got any shoes you’re not using?

All those who believe in psychokinesis – raise my hand.

We haven’t got a plan so nothing can go wrong!