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Anything I shouldn’t laugh at makes me laugh. I mean, I’m bad at that, when somebody is singing something terribly and I’m thinking to myself, ‘If I laugh now, this is the absolute worst thing I could ever do,’ and then I start laughing and I can’t stop.

Simon Cowell

Every time I sat in a chemistry lesson I thought, what am I doing this for? I don’t ever want to be in a job that involves a Bunsen burner.’
SIMON COWELL

Jobs Lessons Want
I’ve learned to deal with stress much better now, things don’t bother me in the way that they once used to.
SIMON COWELL

Country Learned People Stress Way
They understand what their market is and who they should be selling records to, and most importantly, they know the kind of artist that they want to be, but they have to do it themselves. You don’t want a 13-year-old singing some awful song from a musical.
SIMON COWELL

Artist Country People Song Understand Years
You sounded like someone who should be singing on a cruise ship. Halfway through your song, I wished the ship was sinking.
SIMON COWELL

Ships Singing Song
My advice would be if you want to pursue a career in the music business, don’t.
SIMON COWELL

Advice Business Careers
I’m a great believer in getting checked out because if you know you’re OK, you actually feel better; your mind plays a big part of it.
SIMON COWELL

Better Feel Mind Play
Britain’s got talent, enormous talent, that’s very obvious.
SIMON COWELL

Britain Enormous Talent
It’s not our intention to be mean. That’s just within us.
SIMON COWELL

Country Intention Mean People
I suggest we bring some normality back to this country and say if you are carrying a knife, there must be zero tolerance. If it was up to me, everyone caught with a knife would get an automatic ten year sentence.
SIMON COWELL

Country Years Zero
Have I got a black book? Yes, it’s called a mobile phone. I do get offers. There is no shortage of people if you want to go on dates – working in TV, living in L.A., it is there if you want it.
SIMON COWELL

Book Country People Phones
I actually don’t understand a word Paula’s saying anymore. It’s like a new language.
SIMON COWELL

Country Hilarious Language People
Of course I have an ego, but you have to have an ego. You have to be incredibly competitive. I can get competitive at times, way too much, and it becomes a little bit obsessive.
SIMON COWELL

Ego Littles Much Times Too
Sincerity is romantic. I don’t think you need gestures.
SIMON COWELL

Gestures Needs Thinking
Shave off your beard and wear a dress. You would be a great female impersonator.
SIMON COWELL

Country Dresses Female People
Anything I shouldn’t laugh at makes me laugh. I mean, I’m bad at that, when somebody is singing something terribly and I’m thinking to myself, ‘If I laugh now, this is the absolute worst thing I could ever do,’ and then I start laughing and I can’t stop.
SIMON COWELL

Laughing Mean Thinking
I love TV. I love being behind the scenes on a TV show but there’s something about, I don’t know there’s something very special when you’ve signed an artist and that first record comes in and it’s a good record. It is an indescribable feeling.
SIMON COWELL

Artist Feelings Shows

Anything I shouldn’t laugh at makes me laugh. I mean, I’m bad at that, when somebody is singing something terribly and I’m thinking to myself, ‘If I laugh now, this is the absolute worst thing I could ever do,’ and then I start laughing and I can’t stop.

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Popular Authors

Anything I shouldn’t laugh at makes me laugh. I mean, I’m bad at that, when somebody is singing something terribly and I’m thinking to myself, ‘If I laugh now, this is the absolute worst thing I could ever do,’ and then I start laughing and I can’t stop.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Simon Cowell Quotes