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My advice would be if you want to pursue a career in the music business, don’t.

Simon Cowell

I actually don’t understand a word Paula’s saying anymore. It’s like a new language.
SIMON COWELL

Country Hilarious Language People
I’ve always been petrified of working for a boss who I didn’t like but who I was in fear of, because I wanted my salary.
SIMON COWELL

Boss Salary Wanted
I break up very well. I am a good breaker-upper.
SIMON COWELL

Break Broken Hearted Moving
I get very anti-social, depressed and irritable with people. I don’t have time for them. I can’t make phone calls and stuff. I just sit on my own for days.
SIMON COWELL

People Phones Stuff
If I tape an 11-hour day, guess which parts end up on air. Not the bits when I’m pleasant, but the parts when I’m obnoxious.
SIMON COWELL

Air Country Hours People Tape
Anything I shouldn’t laugh at makes me laugh. I mean, I’m bad at that, when somebody is singing something terribly and I’m thinking to myself, ‘If I laugh now, this is the absolute worst thing I could ever do,’ and then I start laughing and I can’t stop.
SIMON COWELL

Laughing Mean Thinking
Harshness to me is giving somebody false hopes and not following through. That’s harsh. Telling some guy or some girl who’ve got zero talent that they have zero talent actually is a kindness.
SIMON COWELL

Girl Kindness Zero
I love producing shows. And so when you’re on a show where other people are making decisions you don’t necessarily agree with it, after a while you start to feel like a passenger.
SIMON COWELL

Decisions People Shows
They understand what their market is and who they should be selling records to, and most importantly, they know the kind of artist that they want to be, but they have to do it themselves. You don’t want a 13-year-old singing some awful song from a musical.
SIMON COWELL

Artist Country People Song Understand Years
I’ve learned to deal with stress much better now, things don’t bother me in the way that they once used to.
SIMON COWELL

Country Learned People Stress Way
Most things in music go full circle eventually.
SIMON COWELL

Circles Full Circle
I don’t mind competition at all. I mean, the record business is the most competitive business in the world, probably. So I’m used to that. In a weird way, it kind of makes you work harder.
SIMON COWELL

Competition Hard Mean Work
The end of the animal trade would leave more time to trap or beat to death pop star wannabes.
SIMON COWELL

Animals Stars
It would hurt my feelings if I respected your opinions.
SIMON COWELL

Feelings Hurt Opinion
I still put punctuation in my texts. If it’s an ‘I’, I make sure it’s a capital.
SIMON COWELL

Capital Punctuation Stills
Shave off your beard and wear a dress. You would be a great female impersonator.
SIMON COWELL

Country Dresses Female People

My advice would be if you want to pursue a career in the music business, don’t.

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My advice would be if you want to pursue a career in the music business, don’t.

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