black
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Meet me where happiness doesn’t feel like a false spring.

Schuyler

If every feeling comes like a wave, I try to decide what kind of coastline I’ll become.
SCHUYLER

Decision Feeling Myself Wave
For now, I’ll bring what I can to my own four walls. I recognize the purpose, the promise of this: a church is made by its space, by its practices.
SCHUYLER

Practice Promise Purpose Recognition Space
Yes, this life is mine, but more often I watch it take place and my hands feel too far away to touch it.
SCHUYLER

Hands Life Myself Place Touch
I know I could be an astronomer of this swooning.
SCHUYLER

Known Myself
In a dream, I’m holding you close and when I wake, I do. How lucky, to want and have.
SCHUYLER

Close Dreams Hold Myself Wake Up
I sit on the bare floor, leave my palms unturned, and watch relief pool into one hand, and uncertainty in the next. I will try not to lean more one way or another, but let them hold each other as company.
SCHUYLER

Company Floor Hands Leaving Myself Uncertain
I’d get lost in this green, ferns leaning against the trees, soil stuck to my feet, never dream of finding my way back again.
SCHUYLER

Dreams Lost Myself Tree Way
My love lives in my cheeks – gives me away by the first smile. all the lines from years spent laughing, warm with extra freckles in the summer; a poker face that doesn’t keep once my knees fold.
SCHUYLER

Face Live Love Myself Smile Summer
Take me back to the evergreen trees; to the sunlight through the leaves, the bending ferns and fronds. The pitter of the rain, the smooth rocks sleeping under moss. Take me back to the life I know before this body.
SCHUYLER

Body Known Leaves Life Myself Sunlight Tree
I descend into an unopened sky, the ocean floor, the final embrace of a graveyard. Find your fill of me before my blue pales like a sour moon.
SCHUYLER

Floor Grave Moon Ocean Open Sky Yourself
I still know the fabric of where I begin and end.
SCHUYLER

Beginning End Fabric Myself
I’m choosing to believe things are getting better again. The give and take of joy, remembering a few days of ache does not mean forever.
SCHUYLER

Believe Better Choice Forever Myself Remember
We’re in spring and I have learned how to be gentle and sharp; strong bark on budding trees. Hold out your hands. I’ll leave a pink kiss and a pocket knife.
SCHUYLER

Hands Learning Leaving Myself Sharp Spring
I will still live like a ghost in the mornings; walking, listening, pouring coffee to finish sometime by the afternoon, when I’ve had enough of watching the world and do all I can to live in it.
SCHUYLER

Enough Ghost Listening Morning Myself Walk
Your anger, your sorrow, your fear, are okay to feel through, no matter how big it feels now.
SCHUYLER

Anger Fear Feeling Sorrow Yourself
I’m writing about moving again, and when I write about moving, I really mean beginning. I’m beginning again.
SCHUYLER

Beginning Deep Move Myself Writing

Meet me where happiness doesn’t feel like a false spring.

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Meet me where happiness doesn’t feel like a false spring.

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