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Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty… mine’s putting in an express lane.

Ron White

You can’t fix stupid.
RON WHITE

Fix Stupid
I go through about 140 cities a year.
RON WHITE

City Go Through Yera
You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered.
RON WHITE

Go Hammer Me Out Truth
My opening acts are always really strong because I need a guy who can take on a big, big crowd. Which is not that easy to do.
RON WHITE

Act Always Big Crowd Do Easy Open Strong To
Diamonds – that’ll shut her up… for a minute!
RON WHITE

Diamond Minute Shut
My shows are not all-the-way filthy, but they can be.
RON WHITE

All Be Can Show Way
My show is more storytelling now than it’s ever been. It’s what I’m good at.
RON WHITE

Beem Ever Good More Show Storytelling
Donald Trump – and I don’t dislike Donald one single bit – has no idea how good the Mexican people are at building tunnels.
RON WHITE

Bit Build Could Country Good Idea People President Single Tunnel
I’ve gathered some of my close musical and comedian friends, and we’re going to see if we can’t bring a few laughs to these soldiers, raise some money, and hopefully lift their spirits.
RON WHITE

Bring Friend Gather Hopefully Laugh New Soldier Spirit
Here’s how I operate. When I see something I like, 20 years later, I ask her brother for her phone number. She don’t even see me coming.
RON WHITE

Brother Come Later Number Operate Phone See Something
I write all of my material. It’s all me.
RON WHITE

All Material Me Write
I was so in love with the idea of making people laugh for a living that I didn’t care what I had to do to get there. Or how much money I was going to make when I did get there.
RON WHITE

Care Good Idea Laugh Live Make Money Much People
I was considered by my peers to be a good comedian. So that’s all I ever strived to do was get some recognition from my peers.
RON WHITE

Been Comedian Consider Fun Good Peer Sure
I consider it an honor and a privilege to give back however I can for the many sacrifices of these incredibly brave men and women.
RON WHITE

Back Brave Consider Honor However Inctredinly Many Men Privilege Sacrifice Women
I loved listening to laughter even as a little kid.
RON WHITE

Even Kid Listen Little Love
My goal is just to become a better comedian.
RON WHITE

Become Better Comedian Goal Just

Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty… mine’s putting in an express lane.

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Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty… mine’s putting in an express lane.

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