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Make up your mind, Snail! You are half inside your house, And halfway out!

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Half Halfway House Inside Make Mind Small

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Hunger has always been more or less at my elbow when I played, but now I began to wake up at night to find hunger standing at my bedside, staring at my gauntly.
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Always Elbow Hunger Less More Night Pray Up Wake
We had our own civilization in Africa before we were captured and carried off to this land.
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The locomotive of my heart was rushing down a dangerously steep slope, heading for a collision, heedless of the warning red lights that blinked all about me, the sirens and the ells and the screams that filled the air.
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Ait Blink Collision Down Fill Heading Heedless Red Rush Scream Steep
But to feel that there was feeling denied me, that the very breath of life itself was beyond my reach, that more than anything else hurt, wounded me. I had a new hunger.
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Anything seemed possible, likely, feasible, because I wanted everything to be possible… Because I had no power to make things happen outside of me in the objective world.
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Somewhere in the dead of the southern night my life had switched onto the wrong track and without my knowing it.
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What could I dream of that had the barest possibility of coming true?
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You usually take it for granted and think you know us, but our history is far stranger than you suspect, and we are not what we seem.
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I could endure the hunger. I had learned to live with hate.
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It had been only through books-at best, no more than vicarious cultural transfusions-that I had managaed to keep myself alive in a negatively vital way.
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Alive Best Book Cultural Keep Manage Me More Support Transfusion Vicarious
Reading was like a drug, a dope. The novels created moods in which I lived for days.
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Make up your mind, Snail! You are half inside your house, And halfway out!
RICHARD WRIGHT

Half Halfway House Inside Make Mind Small
If you’ve a notion of what man’s heart is, wouldn’t you say that maybe the whole effort of man on earth to build a civilization is simply man’s frantic and frightened attempt to hide himself from himself?
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I endowed it with unlimited potentialities, redeemed it for the sake of my own hungry and cloudy yearning.
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In me was shaping a yearning for a kind of consciousness.
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Consciousness Heart Kind Light Night Shape Yearning
I listened, vaguely knowing now that I had committed some awful wrong that I could not undo, that I had uttered words I could not recall even though I ached to nullify them.
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Ache Another Awful Chance Committed Done Knowing Listen Some Undo Vaguely

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