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You can’t get rid of poverty by giving people money.

P. J. O'Rourke

Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government does it to somebody else. This is the idea behind foreign policy.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Country Else Government Idea Prefer Sensible Somebody
Nobody is making Americans buy Chinese goods.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Country Good Make Nobody
Political leaders are expert at saying nothing.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Expert Leader Nothing Political Say
I’m too tough and sensitive to have to have some pubescent twerp with his mom’s earring in his tongue, who combs his hair with Redi-Whip and has an Ani DiFranco tattoo on his shin, come show me how a computer works.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Earn Earring Mom Pubescent Sensitive Some Tongue Toug Twerp
Some people think that welfare reform should have hurt Bill Clinton with black voters.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Black People Reformer Some Think Voter
The body is forever teaching us lessons. There are all sorts of things that we can’t do, shouldn’t do, had better not do very often or do for too long as we get older. The body makes its presence known.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Better Body Forever Lesson Often Older Presence Sort Teach Thing
I look around my house, and everything except the kids and dogs was made in China. And I’m not sure about the kids. They have brown eyes and small noses.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Around Brown Country Dog Everything Except House Kid Look
Arab-led Islamic fundamentalism destabilizes nations from Algeria to the Philippines.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Country Destabilize Nation Religious
It’s better to make fun of yourself because you’ve always got someone around to make fun of, and they can’t sue you.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Always Better Fun Make Someone Sure You
There is one thing women can never take away from men. We die sooner.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Away Men never One Sie Sooner Take Thing Women
You can’t destroy America by destroying our elite. Think about America’s elite. Think about it down through history. Destroy our elite, and about half the time, you’re doing us a favor.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Country Detroit Down Elite History Think
Liberals have invented whole college majors – psychology, sociology and women’s studies – to prove that nothing is anybody’s fault.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Fault Invent Liberal Major Psychology Sociology Study Women
The people who despise America are the editors of the ‘New Statesman.’ Their green-card applications must have been turned down.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Association Card Country Desire Down Editor Green People Turn
Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Difficult Discipline Parent Properly Size
Politics are for foreigners with their endless wrongs and paltry rights. Politics are a lousy way to get things done. Politics are, like God’s infinite mercy, a last resort.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Endless Foreigner God Lousy Politics Right Wrong
Gossip is what you say about the objects of flattery when they aren’t present.
P. J. O'ROURKE

Flatter Gossip Object Present

You can’t get rid of poverty by giving people money.

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You can’t get rid of poverty by giving people money.

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