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If you’re quiet, you’re not living. You’ve got to be noisy and colorful and lively.

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Life literally abounds in comedy if you just look around you.
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I don’t have a mission. I don’t have a torch to burn.
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Anybody can direct, but there are only eleven good writers.
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I love writing songs. I’m a songwriter.
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If Shaw and Einstein couldn’t beat death, what chance have I got? Practically none.
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I only direct in self-defense.
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A lot of music is mathematics. It’s balance.
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Humor is just another defense against the universe.
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The talent of a writer is his ability to give them their separate names, identities, personalities and have them relate to other characters living with him.
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I wish I was better looking.
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I was a soldier in WWII. The last couple of months of the war I was actually in combat.
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I loved Westerns as a little kid, and I loved horror films.
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My job is to go out and entertain the most people possible.
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I’m still a horse that can run. I may not be able to win the Derby, but what do you do when you retire? People retire and they vegetate. They go away and they dry up.
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When you come to Germany as a Jew you have an uneasy feeling, but I’ve always felt okay in Berlin.
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No, no, the songs write themselves, almost.
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