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If you want him to mourn, you had best leave him nothing.

Martial

For wealth’s now given to none but to the rich.
MARTIAL

Rich Wealth
There is no glory in outstripping donkeys.
MARTIAL

Animal Glory
Why do I not kiss you, Philaenis? you are bald. Why do I not kiss you, Philaenis? you are carrotty. Why do I not kiss you, Philaenis? you are one-eyed. He who kisses you, Philaenis, sins against nature.
MARTIAL

Bald Kiss Myself Nature Sin Yourself
I do not hate the man, but his vices.
MARTIAL

Hate Himself Man One Liner Vice
Nothing is more ill-timed than an ill-timed laugh.
MARTIAL

Laughter Time
Why do strong arms fatigue themselves with frivolous dumbbells? To dig a vineyard is worthier exercise for men.
MARTIAL

Arms Exercise Man Strong Worthy
The present joys of life we doubly taste, By looking back with pleasure to the past.
MARTIAL

Doubt Ourselves Pleasure Present Taste
Life is not living, but living in health.
MARTIAL

Health Life Live One Liner
I am a shell-fish just come from being saturated with the waters of the Lucrine lake, near Baiae; but now I luxuriously thrust for noble pickle.
MARTIAL

Lake Luxury Myself Water
Spare the person but lash the vice.
MARTIAL

One Liner Person Vice
If fame comes after death, I’m in no hurry for it.
MARTIAL

Death Fame Hurry Myself
No hero to me is the man who, by easy shedding of his blood, purchases fame: my hero is he who, without death, can win praise.
MARTIAL

Blood Death Easy Fame Hero Himself Man Purchase
Gifts are like hooks.
MARTIAL

Gift One Liner
You praise, in three hundred verses, Sabellus, the baths of Ponticus, who gives such excellent dinners. You wish to dine, Sabellus, not to bathe.
MARTIAL

Excellence Praise Verse Yourself
They let out on hire their passions and eloquence. [Referring to lawyers.]
MARTIAL

Elegant Hire Passion
A good man doubles the length of his existence; to have lived so as to look back with pleasure on our past existence is to live twice.
MARTIAL

Doubt Existence Goodness Live Man
Whoever makes great presents, expects great presents in return.
MARTIAL

Greatness Present Return
If you want him to mourn, you had best leave him nothing.
MARTIAL

Himself Leaving Mourn
He truly sorrows who sorrows unseen.
MARTIAL

Hide One Liner Sorrow True
Conceal a flaw, and the world will imagine the worst.
MARTIAL

Flaw Imagination World Worst
You’re obstinate, pliant, merry, morose, all at once. For me there’s no living with you, or without you.
MARTIAL

Absence Love Myself Togetherness Yourself
Wine and women bring misery.
MARTIAL

Alcohol Misery Wine
See, how the liver is swollen larger than a fat goose! In amazement you will exclaim: Where could this possibly grow?
MARTIAL

Amazing Animal Food Growth Possible Yourself
Genuine is the sorrow endured without anyone else knowing about it.
MARTIAL

Endurance Genuine Known Sorrow
Man loves malice, but not against one-eyed men nor the unfortunate, but against the fortunate and proud.
MARTIAL

Eyes Love Man Proud Unfortunate
The swan murmurs sweet strains with a flattering tongue, itself the singer of its own dirge.
MARTIAL

Swan Tongue
To-morrow I will live, the fool does say; To-day itself’s too late, the wise lived yesterday.
MARTIAL

Fools Future Past Wisdom

If you want him to mourn, you had best leave him nothing.

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If you want him to mourn, you had best leave him nothing.

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