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Jerry Ford is so dumb he can’t walk and chew gum at the same time. He’s a nice fellow, but he spent too much time playing football without a helmet.

Lyndon B. Johnson

Justice requires us to remember that when any citizen denies his fellow, saying, ‘His color is not mine,’ or ‘His beliefs are strange and different,’ in that moment he betrays America, though his forebears created this nation.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Belief Citizenship Creation Different Justice Nation Remember
Better to have him inside the tent pissing out, than outside the tent pissing in.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Better Friendship Himself
We can draw lessons from the past, but we cannot live in it.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Lesson Live Past Wisdom
Greater love hath no man than to attend the Episcopal Church with his wife.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Couple Greatness Himself Love Men Religious Wife
I’ll have those n**gers voting Democratic for the next 200 years.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Democracy Myself Time Vote
I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one’s wife happy. First, let her think she’s having her own way. And second, let her have it.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Funny Happiness Herself Inspirational Learning Life Myself Thinking Wife
I do not find it easy to send the flower of our youth, our finest young men, into battle.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Battle Flower Men Myself Youth
But if future generations are to remember us more with gratitude than with sorrow, we must achieve more than just the miracles of technology. We must also leave them a glimpse of the world as God really made it, not just as it looked when we got through with it.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Achievement Future God Gratitude Nature Patriot Remember Technology World
Ambition is an uncomfortable companion many times. He creates a discontent with present surroundings and achievements; he is never satisfied but always pressing forward to better things in the future. Restless, energetic, purposeful, it is ambition that makes of the creature a real man.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Achievement Ambition Comfortable Creation Future Men Present Purpose Reality Satisfaction Time
Doing what’s right isn’t the problem. It is knowing what’s right.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Action Leadership Right Success Wisdom
Of course, I may go into a strange bedroom every now and then that I don’t want you to write about, but otherwise you can write everything.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Myself Room Strange Writing
Being president is like being a jackass in a hailstorm. There’s nothing to do but to stand there and take it.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Funny History Politics
Let us close the springs of racial poison. Let us pray for wise and understanding hearts. Let us lay aside irrelevant differences and make our nation whole.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Difference Heart Nation Poison Prayer Spring Understand Wisdom
If you have a mother-in-law with only one eye and she has it in the center of her forehead, don’t keep her in the living room.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Eyes Law Mother Room Yourself
Every man has a right to a Saturday night bath.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Man Night Right
John ain’t been worth a damn since he started wearing $300 suits.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Fashion Money Worth

Jerry Ford is so dumb he can’t walk and chew gum at the same time. He’s a nice fellow, but he spent too much time playing football without a helmet.

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Jerry Ford is so dumb he can’t walk and chew gum at the same time. He’s a nice fellow, but he spent too much time playing football without a helmet.

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Popular Authors

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