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Democrats legislate; Republicans investigate.

Lyndon B. Johnson

When the burdens of the presidency seem unusually heavy, I always remind myself it could be worse. I could be a mayor.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Government Myself Worst
A good president does with executive power what Pablo Picasso did with paint. He takes bills into new and slightly discomfiting territory. He puts extra eyes on policies. He moves the mouth of the Supreme Court from where it should be to where it must be.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Eyes Goodness Policy Power
It is the genius of our Constitution that under its shelter of enduring institutions and rooted principles there is ample room for the rich fertility of American political invention.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Endurance Genius Ourselves Politics Principles Rich
If government is to serve any purpose it is to do for others what they are unable to do for themselves.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Government People Purpose
This right to vote is the basic right without which all others are meaningless. It gives people, people as individuals, control over their own destinies.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Control Destiny People Right Vote
If you let a bully come in and chase you out of your front yard, he’ll be on your porch and the next day he’ll rape your wife in your own bed.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Himself Mental Oppression Sex Violence Wife Yourself
Education will not cure all the problems of society, but without it no cure for any problem is possible.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Education Possible Problem
If one morning I walked on top of the water across the Potomac River, the headline that afternoon would read: ‘President Can’t Swim.’
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Morning Oneself Reading
The Russians feared Ike. They didn’t fear me.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Fear History Myself Politics War
There are no favorites in my office. I treat them all with the same general inconsideration.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Equality Justice Myself
I am proud to be a member of a party that opens its doors to all men–and closes its hearts to none.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Heart Myself Pride
No member of our generation who wasn’t a Communist or a dropout in the thirties is worth a damn.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Generation Ourselves Worth
If we must disagree, let’s disagree without being disagreeable.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Agreement Talk
Until justice is blind to color, until education is unaware of race, until opportunity is unconcerned with the color of men’s skins, emancipation will be a proclamation but not a fact.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Education Justice Men Opportunity Race Skin
I want real loyalty. I want someone who will kiss my ass in Macy’s window, and say it smells like roses.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Kiss Loyalty Reality Relationship Rose
Being president is like being a jackass in a hailstorm. There’s nothing to do but to stand there and take it.
LYNDON B. JOHNSON

Funny History Politics

Democrats legislate; Republicans investigate.

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Democrats legislate; Republicans investigate.

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