Man is flying too fast for a world that is round. Soon he will catch up with himself in a great rear end collision.
JAMES THURBERWhere most of us end up there is no knowing, but the hellbent get where they are going.
More James Thurber Quotes
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There is something about a poet which leads us to believe that he died, in many cases, as long as 20 years before his birth.
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Don’t count your boobies until they are hatched.
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One martini is all right. Two are too many, and three are not enough.
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Discussion in America means dissent.
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There is no safety in numbers, or in anything else.
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It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers.
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The dog has got more fun out of Man than Man has got out of the dog, for the clearly demonstrable reason that Man is the more laughable of the two animals
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Mutual suspicions of mental inadequacy are common during the first year of any marriage.
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Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?
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I think that maybe if women and children were in charge we would get somewhere.
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When all things are equal, translucence in writing is more effective than transparency, just as glow is more revealing than glare.
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You might as well fall flat on your face as lean over too far backward.
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A false or misunderstood word may create as much disaster as a sudden thoughtless act.
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Sixty minutes of thinking of any kind is bound to lead to confusion and unhappiness.
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There are two kinds of light – the glow that illuminates, and the glare that obscures.
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The nation that complacently and fearfully allows its artists and writers to become suspected rather than respected is no longer regarded as a nation possessed with humor or depth.
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If you wonder which is the stronger sex, watch which one twists the other around her little finger.
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I am not a cat man, but a dog man, and all felines can tell this at a glance – a sharp, vindictive glance.
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I never really rallied after the birth of my first child.
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Art – the one achievement of man which has made the long trip up from all fours seem well advised
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Humor and pathos, tears and laughter are, in the highest expression of human character and achievement, inseparable.
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The most dangerous food is wedding cake.
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For one thing, she pronounced flowers ‘flars’ and I couldn’t let it slide.
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The difference between our decadence and the Russians is that while theirs is brutal, ours is apathetic.
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I always begin at the left with the opening word of the sentence and read toward the right and I recommend this method.
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I write humor the way a surgeon operates, because it is a livelihood, because I have a great urge to do it, because many interesting challenges are set up, and because I have the hope it may do some good.
JAMES THURBER